How can we help the ultra-timid cat?

Our household consists of my husband, me, our 3 year old son, and up until last September when she died of old age, our elderly cat. 6 weeks ago we adopted a 5 year old shelter cat whose prior owner went into a nursing home. Unfortunately, things have been going really poorly. Angel, our new cat, is scared to death of our son. For the most part, we keep the 2 of them apart, but just hearing him sets her off. She has been living in a closet in a room in our basement. She will come out of the closet for my husband and me to play, but will not leave the room. We did put her food and water bowls and the litter box upstairs to encourage her to explore, but she only comes upstairs when we are asleep or out of the house.

Last week, my son asked to see her. I said okay, because I was thinking that it was absurd that he can't even look at her. I told him that he has to be very quiet and very gentle. He was as good as gold. He said in as soothing voice as a 3 year old, "Here, Kit Catty. Here Kit Catty. Aren't you hungry? Don't you want some fooood. The food is upstairs. Won't you come upstairs?" She let him sniff his hand, and he gently pet her. I thought that it was so sweet, and then she ran to the back of the closet where he couldn't get to her. She has barely been out of the closet since.

I just don't know what to do. She seems to be eating well, but I think that she has been losing weight. It seems like we might not the right family for her.

Any suggestions?

Angel is not used to children. If your son continues with his gentle persuasion Angel may slowly come around. It will take time and patience. Good luck!

It might also help if you were to get a couple of feliway plug-ins and plug them around the house to help make Angel feel more comfortable

What is a "feliway plug-in"? I've never heard of this.

Feliway is a product which reproduces certain pacifying properties of cat facial pheromones.

The placing of facial pheromones is a behaviour which is well known to all cat owners. When a cat feels safe in its environment, it rubs its head from the side of the chin to the base of the ear, against the furniture, the corners of walls or the bottom of curtains. By doing this, the animal is depositing facial pheromones. These marks convey a message of well-being and a feeling of security.

When there is a change in the cat's environment (such as visits to the vets, return from hospitalisation, moving house, new arrivals, rearrangement of furniture) or if the cat is scared, a state of disquiet or stress may develop. In these situations, Feliway Spray or Feliway Diffuser (Plug-In) can be used to restore the natural balance. Feliway is a safe solution of feline facial pheromone, which mimics the cat's natural pheromones, creating a state of well-being and calm.

To find out more, go to www.feliway.co.uk