Hey guys, I need some help

crittermom

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Oct 26, 2005
Messages
6,437
Purraise
2
there has been a fund in memory of Amber(to help John with Lava Girl) suggested by several members. I asked John about it, and he said he would love it.
HOW do I go about setting one up? ANY help is appreciated!!!!
 

katachtig

Moderator
Staff Member
Admin
Joined
Jun 25, 2005
Messages
25,290
Purraise
2,893
Location
Colorado
I don't remember how it worked but when my BIL was killed, there was a fund set up through their credit union for their daughter. So you could check with your bank or one that is near John for the details.
 

wookie130

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
May 5, 2006
Messages
2,313
Purraise
106
Location
an ice cube in Iowa...
Here's instructions on how to create a Paypal donation button...perhaps we could set one up on a separate thread.

http://www.liewcf.com/blog/archives/...nation-button/

Another idea I had was for someone to create a "Kaelyn Donation" thread...John could make a baby gift list or wish list on the Target web site, and members of TCS could purchase items, and ship them to John's address. Or, the donations from the Paypal button could go to John, in fulfillment of his Target baby wish list. Something to that nature...
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #4

crittermom

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Oct 26, 2005
Messages
6,437
Purraise
2
I don't know which would be better.
 

katachtig

Moderator
Staff Member
Admin
Joined
Jun 25, 2005
Messages
25,290
Purraise
2,893
Location
Colorado
I think the biggest difference is how we feel about giving.

If we go with a wish list, we will be purchasing the items directly and know where the money went. Immediate needs would be met.

If we go with a donation fund, we would trust that the money is spent on Kaelyn (which depends on how the fund is set up). Cash could be saved for emergencies or for college funds, etc.
 

valanhb

TCS Member
Veteran
Joined
Mar 2, 2002
Messages
32,530
Purraise
100
Location
Lakewood (Denver suburb), Colorado
Just be careful about the tax implications. I know that we had to look very hard at that with the TCS Cookbook because unless the money went directly to a 501(c)(3) org (which obviously John is not), it does count as income and you can be in big trouble with the IRS if it isn't handled properly.

Sending gifts to Kaelyn wouldn't fall under that because they are gifts and not cash (as far as I know...).
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #8

crittermom

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Oct 26, 2005
Messages
6,437
Purraise
2
O.k. then since we don't want JOhn to get into any trouble, I will see about setting up a gift Registry in a little bit. I'll post the details.
 

neetanddave

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
May 6, 2006
Messages
8,707
Purraise
1
Location
Tarheel State
We could also rotate the purchasing of a period of time, giving them a slower ration of items rather than all at once. That way he would have items coming in at a slower pace, and not be indundated with 25 cases of diapers.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #11

crittermom

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Oct 26, 2005
Messages
6,437
Purraise
2
I'm waiting for the info that I will need from John and then I'll go set it up.I'll post the info as soon as I have it
 

jcat

Mo(w)gli's can opener
Veteran
Joined
Feb 13, 2003
Messages
73,213
Purraise
9,851
Location
Mo(w)gli Monster's Lair
I hate to be a "wet blanket", but it might be wise to wait and see just who will have legal custody of Kaelyn. John is neither her biological father, nor her legal guardian, as he and Amber were not married. Why complicate matters even more for him in this period of grieving?
 

laureen227

Darksome Duo!
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 3, 2003
Messages
19,260
Purraise
387
Location
Denton TX
Originally Posted by neetanddave

We could also rotate the purchasing of a period of time, giving them a slower ration of items rather than all at once. That way he would have items coming in at a slower pace, and not be indundated with 25 cases of diapers.
good idea. & i agree with jcat - no need to rush this. he's got enough to deal with right now.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #14

crittermom

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Oct 26, 2005
Messages
6,437
Purraise
2
I'm waiting for John to let me know what he wants us to do.
 

jcat

Mo(w)gli's can opener
Veteran
Joined
Feb 13, 2003
Messages
73,213
Purraise
9,851
Location
Mo(w)gli Monster's Lair
Originally Posted by crittermom

I'm waiting for John to let me know what he wants us to do.
That might be too much for him at the moment. I realize that you feel the need to take action, but as a preemie, Kaelyn may very well end up spending several weeks in the hospital, so there's no immediate need for baby supplies, and John isn't in a legal position right now to make any "calls" regarding her.
 

dixie_darlin

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jul 25, 2005
Messages
8,031
Purraise
4
Location
Pinellas Park, Florida
Originally Posted by jcat

I hate to be a "wet blanket", but it might be wise to wait and see just who will have legal custody of Kaelyn. John is neither her biological father, nor her legal guardian, as he and Amber were not married. Why complicate matters even more for him in this period of grieving?
Well regardless of wether John has her or Stan, the stuff is for Kaelyn... She needs it either way
 

squirtle

TCS Member
Veteran
Joined
Nov 29, 2003
Messages
5,544
Purraise
1
Location
Sunny Florida
This is a really tough situation, but I have to agree with Tricia 100%... In addition to waiting to see where Kaelyn ends up living (because there will be legal issues that need to be resolved), there isn't a need for anything right now. There has been family at the hospital and I have a feeling John is going to have all the support he needs starting out. People are always around offering help when a tragedy first unfolds, but it is a little later after things settle down that I think people may need the most help. Why not give it a little bit and see what happens? When John and Amber's family read the beautiful tribute that was put together in Amber's honor, I think they are going to be touched. Maybe that's all they need right now.
 

lsulover

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Dec 20, 2006
Messages
5,057
Purraise
1
Location
Columbia, Ms.
Originally Posted by DixieDarlin256

Well regardless of wether John has her or Stan, the stuff is for Kaelyn... She needs it either way
That is true, we wouldn't be buying anything that has to do with John or Stan, we would be buying for Kaelyn.
 

jcat

Mo(w)gli's can opener
Veteran
Joined
Feb 13, 2003
Messages
73,213
Purraise
9,851
Location
Mo(w)gli Monster's Lair
Originally Posted by LSULOVER

That is true, we wouldn't be buying anything that has to do with John or Stan, we would be buying for Kaelyn.
But what if you buy, e.g., clothing or disposable diapers for a newborn, and she isn't released from the hospital for another two or three months? What's the hurry? I just feel that things are being "rushed", both in regard to Kaelyn, and John. Why not give him some time to grieve and come to terms?
 

katachtig

Moderator
Staff Member
Admin
Joined
Jun 25, 2005
Messages
25,290
Purraise
2,893
Location
Colorado
Originally Posted by jcat

But what if you buy, e.g., clothing or disposable diapers for a newborn, and she isn't released from the hospital for another two or three months? What's the hurry? I just feel that things are being "rushed", both in regard to Kaelyn, and John. Why not give him some time to grieve and come to terms?
You are right Tricia. I think everyone is just feeling so helpless in this and feels the need to do something. I trust that Tammy will determine what is right while she works with John.
 
Top