more cat fighting issues...help would be nice...

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catcrazyperson

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ok as some of you might know, my two kitties, peanuts and socks, hate each other.
i'm pretty sure when we got socks that socks was willing to be friends with peanuts, but she's had so much kitty hatred towards him that now he doesn't like her at all.
i got tired of having to constantly keep them separated this weekend, and let them loose. for the most part, they did ok, better then they every have. there were a few swipes at each other and tuffs of hair flying, but like i said this is much better then they've ever done! after a few hours i wanted to get on the computer in the basement so i put socks in my room. when i came back upstairs i almost had a heart attack when i saw socks sitting in the middle of my living room floor. he was sitting a few feet away from peanuts, and they actually looked halfway relaxed. then peanuts got up to see me but socks didn't like that so he followed her. peanuts got all defensive, so socks did too. (have i mentioned that socks is twice the size of peanuts??) suddenly this huge fight
broke out, the kind where they're hissing and spitting and rolling all over he floor. i didn't want to stick my foot in there, so i tryed hissing at them, and with that having no effect, i stuck my foot in and pushed socks away while herding him upstairs. when i came back down peanuts was hiding, but sitting in the middle of the floor was her collar!
this terrifies me, because that means socks was going for her throat.
so now im stuck. im not sure if i should let them be together anymore, if they're gonna try and kill each other! but i dont want to keep them separated for the rest of their lives...
any ideas/suggestions/comments on this will be appriciated!
 
gailuvscats

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If first you don't succeed at first, try, try again. You didn't mention how long you have had them, how old, neutered.

The one thing you did, though, was unintentionally leave them alone unsupervised, after they have been separated the majority of the time.

If they did good for a while, I would keep visits to that amount of time, increasing in increments, and be very neutral towards them until they chill out. But praise them, tell them how good they are when they are together.
 
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catcrazyperson

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Originally Posted by gailuvscats

If first you don't succeed at first, try, try again. You didn't mention how long you have had them, how old, neutered.

The one thing you did, though, was unintentionally leave them alone unsupervised, after they have been separated the majority of the time.

If they did good for a while, I would keep visits to that amount of time, increasing in increments, and be very neutral towards them until they chill out. But praise them, tell them how good they are when they are together.
Click to expand...
i've had peanuts since she was eight weeks old. she used to be feral. she's a little over a year in a half. she's not spayed (yet)
i know this forums is very pro-spay/neuter, and im working on it. there's a few reasons why she hasnt been spayed yet, and please it would be nice if no one would jump on me for not spaying her yet. i feel bad about it, trust me.

socks we've had for about 5 1/2 months. he's about 8 years old, he used to be abused then he was a stray.

thanks for the encouragement
, and yes i try to praise them lots when they're not trying to hurt each other.
 
gailuvscats

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Well, you said you had your reasons for the not spaying yet, and I am not jumping on you, but they will not ever stop fighting until after she is neutered. I imagine a feral, unspayed female cat, doesn't think to much of a male cat entering her territory. You're lucky you didn't get hurt.

I think you might be wise to keep them separated until she is neutered.
 
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catcrazyperson

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yeah i was thinking about that, that its her territory and she doesn't want any other cat invading it. is there any reason that socks hates her so much, besides the fact that she hates him? because in the fight that they had, i couldn't tell for sure but im pretty sure socks attacked her first...

and thanks for not chewing me out for not getting peanuts sprayed yet.
 
gailuvscats

gailuvscats

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Sombody on here that has studied behavior would be better than I to explain it. It all has to do with territory, survival, reproducing.

they will never be freinds until she is spayed, and then there is no guarantee either, but at least you will be on a level playing ground.

I think I read somewhere that an uneutered animal needs to be the dominant one, and since the other cat is a neutered male, he probably thinks he should dominater, and she will not have any parts of that.

Your only hope is to neuter her.
 
persi & alley

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Originally Posted by catcrazyperson

ok as some of you might know, my two kitties, peanuts and socks, hate each other.
i'm pretty sure when we got socks that socks was willing to be friends with peanuts, but she's had so much kitty hatred towards him that now he doesn't like her at all.
i got tired of having to constantly keep them separated this weekend, and let them loose. for the most part, they did ok, better then they every have. there were a few swipes at each other and tuffs of hair flying, but like i said this is much better then they've ever done! after a few hours i wanted to get on the computer in the basement so i put socks in my room. when i came back upstairs i almost had a heart attack when i saw socks sitting in the middle of my living room floor. he was sitting a few feet away from peanuts, and they actually looked halfway relaxed. then peanuts got up to see me but socks didn't like that so he followed her. peanuts got all defensive, so socks did too. (have i mentioned that socks is twice the size of peanuts??) suddenly this huge fight
broke out, the kind where they're hissing and spitting and rolling all over he floor. i didn't want to stick my foot in there, so i tryed hissing at them, and with that having no effect, i stuck my foot in and pushed socks away while herding him upstairs. when i came back down peanuts was hiding, but sitting in the middle of the floor was her collar!
this terrifies me, because that means socks was going for her throat.
so now im stuck. im not sure if i should let them be together anymore, if they're gonna try and kill each other! but i dont want to keep them separated for the rest of their lives...
any ideas/suggestions/comments on this will be appriciated!
Click to expand...
I brought a new cat home eleven days ago and our established cat wanted to be friends with the new cat but the new cat (Alley) stayed hidden under the couch or bed and would fight and hiss if Persi came anywhere near her. I did the put them together in a room with nothing to hide under bit for increasing amounts of time. It got to the point that they would just sit in the room and stare at each other but not attack at all. Persi would assert himself as the male and continue to inch his way up to Alley all the time with me sitting there with camera in hand. I was finally able to snap a picture of their first actual touching, which was early this morning. I was so depressed during much of this time and everybody told me it was going to be OK. Now that they have touched, they are running around the house together even as I type this. At first, Alley had her own room with all of her own private things. A few days ago I moved her litter box into the laundry room right next to Persi's. She adapted. I also moved her food and water to the kitchen right near Persi's and she adapted to that. Now I am optimistic that this "forced bonding" may have something to do with something. I plan on removing the duplicate things in a few days if things continue to go well. One of the things I would do while they were in their sit in the same room and stare at each other phase was to pet both of them at the same time and always, always give them equal attention in everything. One week ago I was so depressed but now I am so optimistic so hang in there and we are all sending good vibes your way!
 
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