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one year

post #1 of 15
Thread Starter 
So, next week is my mother's birthday. It will be a year since I have seen both my parents. And, to be honest, it does not bother me one bit. And, now I don't know what I will do if they try to invite me. Maybe just go there & drop a card off? I am not going to stay more than an hour, if I do go ......... I am happy with the way my life is, and that is all that should matter. I can tell you this: had she never written that letter, it never would have been this way. And, I have tried to forget, but I cannot. They still never ask about my hubby.......

Oh, btw, it was our 5th wedding anniversary on Friday
post #2 of 15
Tigger...not sure what the situation is with your parents, but I can relate.

I haven't spoken to my younger brother in over 3 years now. He did and said things over a long period of time that truly hurt my parents, which they did absolutely nothing to deserve. The final straw was him not coming to my Dad's viewing and funeral when he passed. That to me is unforgivable.

But, since you were invited, I guess I would be the bigger person, show up, stay a minimal amount of time and then go home.

Oh...Happy Anniversary!

post #3 of 15
Tigger, I remember when you were having all those problems a while back. I am sorry you and your parents are still on uncertain terms.

I hope you are able to mend things someday, its such a sad situation.
post #4 of 15
Thread Starter 
I wasn't invited for anything,lol. I meant I was gonna suggest me going to their house and drop off a birthday card.
post #5 of 15
Sorry I misread your original post. Hmmm...could drop off, or could put in the mail. That would be up to you based on how you feel about the situation.
post #6 of 15
I can relate to this, as well. My mother and I have been on lousy terms since I was in high school (some 25 years ago...). I have tried numerous times to build some type of relationship we can both live with, but it is just not to be. I have not spoken one word to my mother since July 19 when we parted ways after a 3-day trip to New York. I tried to keep the peace, but she makes it damn near impossible. Yesterday, I was forced to break the blissful silence and call her to ask a question only she could answer. Oh well. I did find iout that she and her husband will be traveling to Italy from 9/25-10/7, so at least I'll have a break there.
post #7 of 15
Tigger, happy late anniversary! Mine is this Tuesday...8 years!

I think just dropping off a card or mailing it would be good....but that is up to you of course. I am sorry they treat you this way.

Deb, sorry to hear about your mom, too. I remember that trip you took...it's too bad parents have to act this way!
post #8 of 15
Thread Starter 
Happy early 8th anniversary to you & hubby! And, what a way to celebrate an anniversary with a new baby girl! Are you going out to dinner or just hanging?

Well, I called my friend up, since she lives over on that side of town & I told her, and asked if she would mind if I would stop by her house. This way, I have an excuse to go on that side. She thought it was kind of funny, after I told her I was using her, lol. But, she was cool about it & understood, so we'll probably go out to lunch or something.

Does it bother you with the way your mom treats you or are you just passed it?

Yesterday night, I called to thank my mom *she answered* for the $25. that they gave us, and it seemed as if she could have cared less that I called to thank them.
Also, I feel that after those letter & emails, and after my dad defended her & wouldn't listen to her, that his lecturing me on how to live, etc... Well, that put the icing on the cake (and sprinkles & candles), so to speak............. Oh well ...... All I can say is that I have tried, and I think that is all that matters.?
post #9 of 15
Tigger, I can't give you any advice on the parent thing, but I CAN say happy anniversary! I hope you had a fun one!
Debby happy early anniversary! WOW! 8 years! Holy moly.
post #10 of 15
Thread Starter 
Goes by fast, doesn't it? :baloon:
post #11 of 15
Yes it does! This is the longest I have been married. My first marriage ended a couple months before our 8th anniversary.

I think we are just going out for supper somewhere, Tigger, thanks for asking! How did you celebrate yours?
post #12 of 15
Thread Starter 
We went out to lunch on Saturday to the Islands. It's a restaurant that has "fine" burger, chicken, etc. It's normal priced ($20.00 for both of us). I didnt feel like having steak for a dinner, since I don't eat it.
post #13 of 15
Thread Starter 
I called my mother-in-law for advice on what to do about whether sending a card or taking it over. She said for me to do what feels right & do what my heart tells me. I am stuck. I want to, but I don't want to. I have tried & tried, but if she never would have written that damned letter & emails, it never would have been like this. I called hubby & he doesn't even think meeting my friend is a good idea so I can be on that side of that town. He was like "no, no, no." What do I do? I feel so confused on this issue right now. I was glad my mother-in-law listened to me, too.

Ok, after talking to hubby, I am going to send a card thru the mail. I need to do what is best for me for once & not what they want me to do. I don't like being forced into situations, and that is what I am putting myself into ....... I feel like I am obligated to go,but I shouldn't. If they want to see me, they can stop by ......... For once in my 25 years, I will take a stand, by gosh. And, if Family World War III breaks out, then too bad. Hubby made a point that if I keep doing what they want me to do, then it's going against everything that I have believed in. I wish I had everyone over at my house, lol. He said if they try to give me crap on the phone, then he told me to put him on the phone. And, as much as I wouldnot want that, that may solve the problems.
post #14 of 15
I am glad you are standing up for yourself!!! And you are still sending a card in the mail, so they can't say you didn't do anything at all. And you weren't even invited in the first place were you? I don't think they have any right to give you a hard time about anything when you weren't even invited! You just stick to your guns and do what feels right for you! I'm glad your hubby is behind you on this!
post #15 of 15
Thread Starter 
Thanks, Debby Thank you for listening ..........
I justhope I don't wimp out
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