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Venting about DH

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 
So yesterday I had a terrible migraine from 1pm-10pm. Hubby comes home and I start to cry. I was dying for him to feed the cats. Molly was laying on me and yelling for food. I told him I didn't do the dishes yet. "that's ok hunny you are sick." Now remember that.
He goes to feed the kitties and says "do you plan on sleeping the rest of the night? If so can you lay in the bedroom instead" WTH!!!

So I get up this morning and discovered the dishes from yesterday are still there & then some. I know I am not working right now but since when am I the only one who cleans?

Ever since I left my job I hear things like "that litter box smells" while he sits right next to it and the scoop. The only thing he does without me asking is taking the trash out.

Men!

hehe thanks I feel better now
post #2 of 13
This may not make me very popular and I must confess I'm an old-fashioned type of girl, but if I didn't work outside the home, I would not expect my hubby to come home from work and wash dirty dishes or do laundry or wash floors or any of those other tasks. I figure if he was bringing home the bacon, the least I could do is cook it.
post #3 of 13
We both work, but if one of us gets a day off, we expect the other to do some extra chores around the house so we can spend more quality time together instead of sitting around alone in the day and not doing it then wasting time we could spend together cleani9ng.

In the case of a migraine a little different, but in general, I wouldn't complain about him not doing any of the tidying if I was home all day and could do it
post #4 of 13
Thread Starter 
I think it bothers me b/c he didn't help much before when I worked either and right now I am PMSing. He does the cooking. He loves to & I hate it.
Just would be nice if he would help instead of complaining about it.
post #5 of 13
Hmmm, with you being sick, he should definately help out with the things you normally do.

I know most men think that if they work and the woman stays home..they shouldn't have to do anything at all around the house because the woman is home all day...Or vice versa..whatever spouse is home should do EVERYTHING.

I agree that if I worked, and my hubby stayed home, I would expect things to be done...but NOT if he was sick.
post #6 of 13
when I was a stay at home wife, I did all the cooking/cleaning & everything.....that was my work. I enjoyed it. But now that I'm working all day and have kids all weekend, I do need help. That being said, you having a migraine is a pass to have a "sick" day. And I think your DH did help out by feeding the kitties....most men will not offer to do the dishes.....and will only do them by nagging request. I would just call it even, and not dwell on this one. If your pmsing, that's probably the jist of it, or if there's alot more that has been building up too.....and this is just the straw that broke the camels back....

I got an "advice" book at my wedding shower, it was passed around, and everyone wrote their "advice" for the new bride....one aunt wrote, pick & choose your battles wisely, you can fight about something everyday if you let yourself....don't let it happen!
post #7 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yosemite View Post
This may not make me very popular and I must confess I'm an old-fashioned type of girl, but if I didn't work outside the home, I would not expect my hubby to come home from work and wash dirty dishes or do laundry or wash floors or any of those other tasks. I figure if he was bringing home the bacon, the least I could do is cook it.
I agree with this completely! And you mentioned that he cooks as well? You should consider yourself lucky

Also, did he ask you to move to the bedroom so he wouldn't disturb you doing things like watching tv and such? When my fiance tells me to go to bed when I am not feeling well I don't take it as being mean. It's just a way of saying don't worry about anything, just go rest and get rid of your headache
post #8 of 13
He should have helped out. Especially if you weren't feeling well. But that is done with now. Ty to not let it eat at you. I realized that is what I was doing wit hlee when he would be off and not help around the house. I just let it go. Do my usual and don't bother getting my panties in a knot over the little things.
post #9 of 13
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phenomsmom View Post
He should have helped out. Especially if you weren't feeling well. But that is done with now. Ty to not let it eat at you. I realized that is what I was doing wit hlee when he would be off and not help around the house. I just let it go. Do my usual and don't bother getting my panties in a knot over the little things.
Thanks! That is why I posted so I can vent and move on.

Speaking of moving on, time to do the dishes. LoL
post #10 of 13
See the way I look at it is this: You left your job, and so now you're the house-person/wife whatever you want to call it.
That's OK. You work on keeping the house clean everyday, doing the dishes and laundry and stuff.

He goes into work everyday. He works on whatever his job entails him to do. He gets sick time and vacation time where one of his other co-workers or the boss covers for him while he's gone.

When is your sick time/vacation time? Sick time was last night. He could've at least washed the dish he used last night.
post #11 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by lunasmom View Post
See the way I look at it is this: You left your job, and so now you're the house-person/wife whatever you want to call it.
That's OK. You work on keeping the house clean everyday, doing the dishes and laundry and stuff.

He goes into work everyday. He works on whatever his job entails him to do. He gets sick time and vacation time where one of his other co-workers or the boss covers for him while he's gone.

When is your sick time/vacation time? Sick time was last night. He could've at least washed the dish he used last night.
But what if he had a bad day as well and was tired when he returned home... Wasn't it nice of him to have sent her on to bed and fended for himself for the night?
post #12 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yosemite View Post
This may not make me very popular and I must confess I'm an old-fashioned type of girl, but if I didn't work outside the home, I would not expect my hubby to come home from work and wash dirty dishes or do laundry or wash floors or any of those other tasks. I figure if he was bringing home the bacon, the least I could do is cook it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by squirtle View Post
I agree with this completely! And you mentioned that he cooks as well? You should consider yourself lucky

Also, did he ask you to move to the bedroom so he wouldn't disturb you doing things like watching tv and such? When my fiance tells me to go to bed when I am not feeling well I don't take it as being mean. It's just a way of saying don't worry about anything, just go rest and get rid of your headache
Quote:
Originally Posted by squirtle View Post
But what if he had a bad day as well and was tired when he returned home... Wasn't it nice of him to have sent her on to bed and fended for himself for the night?
he could have been like my ex and refused to so much as get a bowl of water for the dogs. I think when you get a good man who works and provides and will on occasion fend for himself, and take out the trash, and atleast do the cooking you should be really grateful. Cause some women end up with men who wouldn't know how to turn the stove on.
post #13 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by squirtle View Post
But what if he had a bad day as well and was tired when he returned home... Wasn't it nice of him to have sent her on to bed and fended for himself for the night?
Sure!

I think when I posted I was concentrating more on the chores and had it in my mind that she was already in bed. My bad!
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