Well, this is how I tell...and it may sound silly....I'm not good at putting these things into words....but this always works for me...look at the underside of the kitten...if there are two openings very close together,(right next to each other) then it is a female.
If the "openings" are just a bit apart, with a space in between them, it is a male.
This isn't very well put, and I am sure there is a better way of telling, but that is how I tell!
That is a very good question. When we first decided to get a kitty, we wanted a female. I wasn't very "cat smart" at the time and I didn't want a male because of the spraying thing I had always heard about in the past.
We got Jedi when he was 5 weeks old. The owners told us the kitten was a female, but when I took kitty to the vet about a week later, I was saying stuff like, "Oh she is so good, litter trained already, she is doing this and that, and so on". Dr Hardy says to me, "Well I have to tell you Carla that she is actually a HE"!
What? I had never checked myself. I had taken the word of the owners of the litter. But after talking to Dr Hardy about why I didn't want a male, he assured me that if I had Jedi neutered at a young age, that would help deter the spraying. He also indicated that female cats spray as well as males. So we decided to keep him.
I have never been sorry for one day. Even though we were a little surprised to find out we had a little boy, he is the most loving and adorable kitty in the world (IMHO) and I wouldn't trade him for anything.
Dr Hardy showed me how to check the sex in case we decide to get Jedi a playmate (which we have been discussing for a couple of weeks now). So next time, we will know what we have when we bring the baby home.
Here is a great article on Determining the Sex of Kittens. It has pictures and everything, so you can definitely tell. Carla, you can even print it out and take it with you when you go to check out new babies.
I read about this in a book, and the illustrations from the reply above mine might help...I haven't looked at them yet.
If you lift up the kitty's tail, you'll see his/her pooper.
Underneath, if you see a small hole that is more like a bit of a slit, it's a girl. If there is a hole with two bulges on the sides of it, you have a boy.
However, we thought Tink was a boy when we first found her...she was only 2 weeks old and it was hard to tell. She likes to sleep on her back in our arms, though, and those six little nipple marks that lined her tummy gave it away.
Hehe.
If for some reason you still can't tell, consult a vet. Good luck!