Meowmy Bobbie Needs Advice From Evfurryone

There is a 70 year old woman who lives across the street from my best friend, Shannon. She is very controlling, SAYS she is lonely because her husband pays her no attention, and is a Member of the Art Society, the Red HAt Society, goes to luncheons, etc. In short, she has a full social life.

However, when I (or any of Shannon's other friends or family) come over, Mrs. Francis is ringing the bell or calling to come over within 10 minutes of my arrival.
This happens 80% of the time when I go over for a visit (I call beforehand, always; I never just pop in.)
She came over last Thanksgiving just before we were ready to sit down to dinner. She did the same thing last Easter. She did it when Shannon's sisters were visiting and I had been asked to come over to meet them and have a graduation party for her son. She invites herself along when Shannon and I meet to see a movie together.
She did it Christmas Eve, Christmas morning (I was invited all these times. She was not), and she did it again last night. She orchestrates things and takes over. She wants to be the center of attraction.

She's just like Gladys Kravitz on "Bewitched."


Does anyone have advice for me? I am about to blow a fuse.

Thanks ! Bobbie

P.S. It bugs Shannon as well, but Shannon has so far been to nice to say anything.

Could I nicely write or ask this woman to allow me time with my friend?

I'd just come straight out and tell her that she is not invited. This is not a 'friendly' situation and she's having a very negative effect on your life.

You'll lose her acquaintance, but I think that this might be what you want.
Right now you are letting her walk all over you--you have to tell her, quite honestly, that you want to do things with other people--and that she's not welcome to walk right in and help herself to your Thanksgiving dinner!

True, in some parts of the country they do that (I remember neighbours would just drop in when I lived in Georgia! and I thought it a charming custom, but these were friends who didn't take all the attention away from whatever I was doing!) Culture or no culture, if that isn't what you want in your house or your life, put your foot down.

The problem is that it is in my friend's hosue and not in mine.
I talked to Shannon, and she begged me not to say a word. This woman is a mean bitch, is vindictive, and she can make Shannon's life miserable. Shannon is going to say something, but not now.

P.S. I live in GA, and I call before I go over to anyone's house 98% of the time unless it is just to take something, etc.

Thanks so much for your reply!

Well, I'd invite Shannon over to your house instead of going to hers and don't let the woman follow her. How can she make Shannon's life miserable? There are laws against that sort of behaviour..

Georgia hospitality is wonderful. Pushy neighbours are not.

Originally Posted by gizmocat

Well, I'd invite Shannon over to your house instead of going to hers and don't let the woman follow her. How can she make Shannon's life miserable? There are laws against that sort of behaviour..

Georgia hospitality is wonderful. Pushy neighbours are not.

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amen! Amen! It is just so nice to go there because she has 2 teenagers there, she has work to do at hoem, and I help her, we get her stuff done, and we talk. I went over yesterday, and the woman did not show up at all, thank goodness!