I'm feeling really lonely

trouts mom

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I just got off the phone with my mom, and was just talking about the possibility of someday moving back to my hometown where she is and all my friends are...

I was asking her what kind of life is it to have no friends, and nothing to do but sit around by myself..and I realized..I am 25, in the prime of my life, young and healthy and I have absolutely noone here. I feel very alone..

Usually I can handle it as I try to keep busy...but just realizing that every person that means anything to me is long distance and 7 hours away..


Is this worth it? Why do I even live here? Should I go back to where I came from?

I don't even know, I'm sad.
 

4crazycats

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Aww SWEETIE! Thats how I felt before I started dating John. I wasnt sure if it was worth it living by myself. I wanted to go back to Stan sooo badly. But knew I couldnt if I wanted to be happy. Do you not have any friends at all nearby? Any way to meet people out there? I hope you feel happier soon. It really sucks being alone.
 

lookingglass

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Okay, lets back up. You are a wonderful independant woman who can do anything she wants!

Now that that is out of the way, weigh your options. Do you love where you are? Do you want to go back home?

EDIT: I am your friend!
 

lunasmom

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Awww...is there a local organization that you can join that has younger people in it?
Is there anyone from work or volunteering that you want to hang out with?

Are there any local activities? I.e. we have a singles group that meets at different cities in the metro area about twice a month. They usually do fun things like go see a play, show up at a flashy night spot, etc.

Those were some of the things that I did...after college I moved back to my parents and KNEW NO ONE. So I joined the local Jaycees chapter met some people there. there are only a few people I talk with on occassion still, but they were all nice people just interested in getting know new people.
 

ericanicole

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No be sad!!
Try meeting up with old friends!!!
try joining any social groups located near you.
when i went to college i joined a sorority, as an example....
it opened up doors to many friendships.

do you work?/go to school?
Your a beautiful lady...people should be dying to get to know you!
 

pushylady

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you're never alone on the CatSite, Natalie!

You know, I ask myself the same question - why am I living here when my closest family is in NZ?
If you're missing out on too much by not moving back Ottawa way, then I say you should move back!
 

russian blue

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Awww...I'm so sorry you're feeling that way! You could come to Toronto - enough life here to never keep you bored!

I would sit down and do a pro and con list of your current situation. Then compare that list to one made up for your hometown. Remember, you're able to do anything you want right now......nothing is really tying you down. Life is short - if you need to change course, take the plunge. You're young and free and should be enjoying these days of new experiences/people/places.

I was feeling really down this time last year. I was in a job I hated and didn't understand why I was placing myself under that kind of stress. I did the pros/cons list mentioned above, and handed in my resignation at the beginning of the New Year. That was the best thing I have ever done for myself!!!

Really listen to your inner voice Natalie and the answer will be obvious.
 

russian blue

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Originally Posted by pushylady

You know, I ask myself the same question - why am I living here when my closest family is in NZ?
I was thinking that too - Southern Ontario or NZ? Snow or sun? Hmmm...I think NZ has much more appeal. No competition....I think you're crazy!
 

theimp98

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Moving away from home is hard, and i really think as we get older, it can get harder and harder to meet new friends. But to make yourself feel at home there, you will need to get out and meet some people, maybe do some work for a local animal place on the weekend, or take a class in a local college. , lol a dance class may be fun.

i agree with the others you are very nice lady,i am sure people would love to get to know you.

you may find that if you go back home now, that its not all you remember. I k now when i come back, friends married, or they had moved away, or jobs kept everyone to busy to do stuff. The only good part was that i was able to spend time and be with my mother. if the reason you want to go back home is to be near your family then i think its the right choice.

however if you take the time and get out, do some social things.i bet you will be fine,
 

bella713

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Oh Nat I'm sorry you are feeling lonely, I'm sure the holidays aren't helping what your feeling either. I know what you are feeling I have no family near me the closest is my sis and her family and they are 10 hours away and all the rest including my parents, brothers, and all my friends are 12 hours away, my only difference is I'm married and I certainly can't move back home, but you can, your young and single and have your whole life ahead of you.
All I can say is for you to follow your heart
, it will not let you down.
 
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trouts mom

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The problem with moving back is that my friends ARE different there now..I still love them, but they are all about partying and getting drunk all the time, and that really isn't me anymore.

Here, I used to love my job and I had a really good friend who recently became an ex-friend and we happen to work together. So at the same time, my job went to crap, and my one good friend is not that anymore..I just feel lost , like I don't know where I belong.


Thanks for the nice comments..how much easier would things be if all of you lived here?
 

neetanddave

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Well, I hope you listen to the advice others have given you. I tried telling you these same things....


Who lives near Nat? We need an intervention!
 

pami

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Oh Natalie, Maybe you just need to go get some whiskey


Seriosuly, we all go through times where we reevaluate where we are in our lives. Have we made the right decisions/choices. Loneliness doesnt escape anyone. As long as you feel like you have made the right decisions for your life, the rest of it will fall into place. This will pass and you will up and running again, I promise
 

miss mew

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You know it really is that time of year where alot of people feel lonely. But I do hear what you are saying.

I agree with Kass, trust your inner voice. I believe that everything happens for a reason, during the time that you are alone I'm sure you are getting to know yourself and what you really want in life.

Things will work out for you in the end
 

MoochNNoodles

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I do feel for you. I think everyone here has given you some good advice. I would do whatever it is that works for you (lists, spreadsheets, quiet time, etc) for you to seriously and objectively evaluate your life. If your heart is telling you that you need a change, then listen to it. There is no way of knowing what's on the other side of any doors we open, but we've got to go through some door!
 

white cat lover

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You know, I live at home with my parents & have no friends. I started volunteering at the local Humane Society & met another girl my age. She understands me being so anal about my cats & dogs. Most other people told me I was dumb to pay to get them fixed & to keep them inside. She just "gets me".
 

icklemiss21

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Everyone has given you good advise, so I don't have much more to offer but some hugs.

Everyone feels the same way at some point in their lives and only you know what will make you happy, but remember we are all here if you need some help making that decision and that some of us are not that far away if you really feel the need to just 'see' someone
 

ericanicole

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Originally Posted by icklemiss21

Everyone has given you good advise, so I don't have much more to offer but some hugs.

Everyone feels the same way at some point in their lives and only you know what will make you happy, but remember we are all here if you need some help making that decision and that some of us are not that far away if you really feel the need to just 'see' someone
High 5 to that!
 
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