Bullying problems

bazkitty

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I have a total of seven cats. All are rescue or shelter cats...6 female and one male. Za ch is a Maine Coon mix and weighs in close to about 20 pounds....he also has since we've had him in the past year, bullied the three female cats that were here before he came home, but not the ones that came aftre he was brought in. He has done this to an exent, but in the past six months or so, it has gotten worse. We've tried everything and have gone so far as to use medication for behavior modification, but to no avail. I don't have a spare room to put him in at the moment, as all are occupied with others, but when we do, he digs at the carpet and rips it to shreds.


Other than the bullying, he's a wonderful kitty, and doesn't get into trouble. I hate to have to rehome him, but I'm thinking that it may be what I need to do. Halle is 12 and she seems to be a main target for him, and I don't think she should have to live like this with him going after her like he does.

I've asked my inlaws to take him, but they won't as they are cat people and don't have any cats now. My sister has an older female, and I don't want her to take him and have him bully her either. I won't take him back to the shelter, but don't want him to go to just anyone. This is killing me, but I don't know what else to do. Any suggestions??


Edited to add: we have tried the feliway plugins and vanilla on the nose, and everything else we can think of, but nothing has worked.
 

larke

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And it won't - been through it too many times. Having nowhere to keep the girls safe is a problem, and not being able to get him away is just as bad. You really may have to start working on finding the right place for him (either as a sole cat, or in a place with young males, so his being new won't translate into his trying to be #1 again, because younger males will balance things out - but everyone needs to be neutered, of course.
 
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bazkitty

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All are spayed and he is neutered...I just hate the having to rehome him as it's something I've never done before.
 

yayi

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I have 2 bullies and will never part with them. QT (f) and Wawa (m) love picking on the other 9 cats. I agree with Larke that it is difficult to change their behavior. I do not use Feliway or behavior altering drugs but my home is quite peaceful most of the time.
Time outs, making myself the alpha cat and knowing when not to interfere during their "disagreements" are my way of living with my crew. It's a long learning process but I have no choice. I want them with me, they're my family.
 

natalie_ca

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Originally Posted by yayi

I have 2 bullies and will never part with them. QT (f) and Wawa (m) love picking on the other 9 cats. I agree with Larke that it is difficult to change their behavior. I do not use Feliway or behavior altering drugs but my home is quite peaceful most of the time.
Time outs, making myself the alpha cat and knowing when not to interfere during their "disagreements" are my way of living with my crew. It's a long learning process but I have no choice. I want them with me, they're my family.
Chynna is my oldest (she will be 15 years in January). She was my only cat for the first 6 years and then I adopted Abby. Chynna and Abby tolerate one another and Chynna is definitely the alpha cat between the 2 of them, but I trump them both!!!! And they know that.

Chynna was such a bully to Abby, and still can be, but it has gotten way better over the years. Chynna has learned that I won't tolerate her being mean to Abby and that I'll intervene and admonish her with a good talking to if she is. I don't hit her, squirt her or yell at her. I just rush over and sternly tell her no and to be nice, and put my hand over her eyes to block her view of Abby.

I don't separate them when I go out, and when I come home there isn't any blood and gore around and Chynna is usually curled up either in the pots cupboard or on the bed sleeping. So I think she gets the point that she has to be nice or just tolerant of Abby, even when I'm not home, hehe

There has to be a pecking order in the house with the human at the top of the list. My cats have the run of the house, but I'm still the Queen.
 

fishtreatsmom

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I'm having a similar problem. My carpet is being torn to shreds by the door where I have my cats separated. Monty has bully tendencies it seems. He's always stalked and chased my girl cat Zena but somehow she tolerates it and no major injuries have occurred. We have a new guy now and Monty attacked him rather viciously and they are now separated. I'm wondering if bullying is a learned behavior. Monty was bullied by another cat when he first came to our home (this other cat has crossed the bridge since then) now Monty is the successor to the throne...and Top Cat. I don't want to rehome any of my cats. I've spent a ton of money on Monty's P-U operation and hospitalizations, the new boy is a semi feral and won't do well yet in someone's home - he is only bonded to me right now. The only thing I'm afraid of is Monty biting Harley and causing massive injuries like losing an eye- thats my biggest fear right now.
 

rang_27

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I have no suggestions as I'm having similar problems with my Isaac being a bully, I just have to say that this thread makes me feel better. I was really afraid it was something I was doing that was making him that way, but I see it's a more common problem than I knew. The only damage Isaac has ever done is that Levi currently has a 1/2" long by 1/4" wide bald patch. Isaac ripped his fur out. I think he is trying to be top cat, a position Jordan has held from day 1.
 
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bazkitty

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As much as I hate to say it, it's nice to know I'm not the only one that has this problem.

All the years I've had cats, 18 if them, I've NEVER rehomed an animal ...but then again everyone always got along and I never had this problem. We do let Zach know that this is not accecptable (sp) when he does do this by saying his name very sharply along with NO (even the dog barks when we say his name when he's doing this) and then going towards him and he runs away. Halle and Marilyn, not to mention Zach, have all had scratches on their noses and heads from all of this. It just gets so frustrating to me not to be able to get him to stop, and I don't think the girls should have to look over their shoulders every time they turn around. I love them all dearly, and just wonder if any of them are happy with this situatiuon.
 
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