DUMB THINGS You Thought as a Kid

swampwitch

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When I was little, I thought our bodies had thick, solid skin around the bones (like a Gumby doll).

I used to think that women had a little camera in their belly buttons, and it would take pictures of their husbands, so their baby could look like him.

One of my sisters had me believing that I was adopted (I wasn't), AND that my parents were disappointed when I was born because they wanted a boy.

My husband used to lie awake at night when he was a kid, worrying that he might be the anti-christ, and just didn't know it yet.


What about you?

Cheers, from
SwampWitch
 

starryeyedtiger

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I used to think that the turn signals magically came on every time my mom would turn onto a street or onto a bridge


I used to think that I was eating chicken when we had dinner at my nanny's house...only to find out when I grew up that they were actually feeding us rabbit
(they used to raise and sell meat rabbits for food to make ends meet- they had over an acre of land they raised them on. One day my sister kimmy and I walked outside to see what our paw paw was up to when we saw him chop one of the bunny's head off
We started screaming at the top of our lungs and ran back into my nanny's house and told her and my mom what our grandad had done. My nanny went outside and got all onto him for doing that in front of us (he didn't realize we were there)....after that, my sister and I realized that the "chicken" they had been feeding us all that time was really those cute little bunnies....and we refused to eat dinner that night. We also refused to leave their house until we were allowed to take one of the bunnies home with us to "save it" lol. Muffin lived for a nice long time after we rescued her on our farm)

I used to think that the toilet was going to suck me into it every time i flushed it when i was little and potty training- so i was petrified of it and made my mom flush the toilet for me so that the toilet wouldn't take me away


I used to think that my mom's shoulder blades were another set of boobs
 

bella713

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I used to think that you could sit on a cloud, that they were solid!!!
I used to think my sis was going to die when she would lay her head over the bed and tell me, when all the blood rushed to her head she would die!!!
 

dixie_darlin

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I used to think that cats were girls and dogs were boys (imagine what breed it would be
)

My sisters also told me I was adopted from Eithiopia and that a white van was going to come and pick me up to take me back to my "real" family once my "adopted" family "fattened" me up... for MONTHS I cried when I seen white vans


I thought Superman was real used to think when I grew up I would meet him and marry him ( I had a HUGE crush on Christopher Reeves
RIP)


My friends and I would actually eat bubble gum to see if I would fart bubbles
 

fats mcgee

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This is my cousin's fault: It was xmas or thanksgiving and we had ham and my cousin told me that it was the pigs butt and the bone was the butthole and I never ever ate ham again. True story.

LMAO@being the anti-christ.
 

starryeyedtiger

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Originally Posted by DixieDarlin256

My sisters also told me I was adopted from Eithiopia and that a white van was going to come and pick me up to take me back to my "real" family once my "adopted" family "fattened" me up... for MONTHS I cried when I seen white vans
oh my, that's aweful!!! wow, your sister was a meanie
 

babyharley

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You know how they had only black and white tv sets back in the day? Well, sily me - I thought everyone WAS black and white, and nothing was in color


I also used to think that when songs were being played on the radio, the band was actually in the studio playing them live, like the bands were all lined up waiting for their turn to play on the radio


I was a weird child
 

MoochNNoodles

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I used to think if you fell and skinned you knee on the grass, that clover would grow out of your knees. I also thought if you ate watermellon seeds that they would grow inside you. I blame all this on my big cousin.

I thought if you tucked your hair behind your ears, they would eventually stick way out like Dumbo.
 

lovemybabies

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I used to think:

-that if you braided your hair, it would grow faster.

-that if I drew on myself enough, it would eventually turn into a tattoo.

-that if I crossed my eyes in front of a mirror, they would be stuck that way.
 

proudkittiemom

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i remember when I was little my one brother use to tell me that I was adopted thats why I was blonde and they all had dark hair (later I found out that I get the blonde from my grandma and her sisters and my brother still tries to tell me that I am lieing haha)

I also that if you had a tattoo that you were like a bad person or something and well I dont know what I thought its too hard to explain and then I went with her to get it and now I LOVE tattoos and piercings


Also I thought that when you drank alcohol you were an alcoholic and so if I would find out that my mom or dad drank I would get really upset (still dont know where I got this stuff)

There is sooo much more that i cant even think of haha I believed alot when I was little
 

abigail

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eating a water melon made your tummy swell into pregnancy

you were one large container and you just started filling up with food until you were "full"

if you didn't put a bandaid on a cut you could lose all your blood

babies were extracted surgically before the mother exploded

and lima beans were plant fetuses and shouldn't be eaten.
 

fwan

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I used to think i could fly by jumping off the coffee table with teatowels
 

proudkittiemom

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Originally Posted by StarryEyedTiGeR

I used to think that the little blue smirfs were real
so did i and i thought they were soo cool i still
the smurfs lol and another thing was superheros i thought they were all real and i had quit an imagination
 

ryn

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Originally Posted by StarryEyedTiGeR

I used to think that the toilet was going to suck me into it every time i flushed it when i was little and potty training- so i was petrified of it and made my mom flush the toilet for me so that the toilet wouldn't take me away
I was like that too.

Let me see...

I thought I could fly with a broom if I jumped high enough (a big rock, ladders, tall stairs etc.) to get proper lift. It's a wonder I didn't break anything.

I believed there was a vampire living in our basement. (I'm currently open about the idea of our attic being a vampire gangs lair, it certainy looks like that.
)

I was also afraid the vacuum cleaner would suck me in.
 

KitEKats4Eva!

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My goodness these are great! What a great idea for a thread!

When I was a kid, I used to imagine that I had an imaginary, invisible, stretchable arm that came out of the middle of my chest that I could use to do things without anyone knowing. For example, to poke my brothers in the ear on long car rides, or to steal extra food when no one was watching, or to change the channel on the TV.

I was the youngest, only girl though, so these fantasies were probably born from me barely ever being the first person to get anything!!


I also used to think that if I could just make myself believe it enough, I could move stuff with my mind. It never worked, of course, and I always used to blame myself for just having that slightest bit of doubt that I could do it!
 

satai

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I love this thread. I'll probably be back with more, but I remembered these as I was reading.

My younger sister though babies came out of their mother's side.

My grandmother had half-convinced my sisters and I that our little brother was the second coming of Christ (concieved immaculately). Meanwhile, my poor brother was convinced with my grandmother's talk of his sisters being "the spawn of Satan" and his own names spelling out 6,6,6 that he was in fact the Anti-Christ.

I thought, because of the serious tone of the intro, that the A-Team was a documentary.

After years of not believing in Leprechauns, my siblings and I were convinced by the credits of Darby O'Gil and the Little People that Leprechauns did in fact exist (the credits thank King Brian for his cooperation etc, and I guess we thought lying in the credits was like false advertising).
 

trouts mom

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I wasn't too bad...I thought if I ate seeds, I would grow said fruit in my belly...and also I thought "amen't" was a word...It means "am not"..Still makes sens to me


Oh, and I thought I was adopted because my sister told me I was.. I would always go searching through my moms filing cabinet for adoption papers all weeping and dramatic..LOL
 
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