For you single people

Originally Posted by Tavia'smom

Okay I was thinking about this while at dinner last night. I am really tired of being single. And I want to know who else is tired of it.

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I'm more tired of trying to get my life exactly where I want it to be. When that's in order, I'll take care of being single.

Originally Posted by Auntie Crazy

By the way, for you single guys, I'm in my early 40's and I live in Central Massachusetts.

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Originally Posted by SchwarzeKatz

But the name "Auntie Crazy" might scare them a little.

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True. Then again, maybe it would intrigue them.

You don't have to be single to be loney. My first marriage wasn't a good one and I felt lonely and unloved, but I couldn't date, either. It wasn't a good place to be!

IMHO, unless you find the right person, it's preferable to be by yourself.

Cheers, from
SwampWitch

I would like to be truly alone... but then MOM wouldnt be here so I guess no MAN is not a big deal I have no time as it is

Dear Singles:

I have been in a committed relationship for 3 years now. While I'm not trying to "rub this in your posts", I am trying to point out, I'm on the CAT SITE on a Friday night.
B and I have barely said little to each other all day and right now he's in his
man cave playing text twist and watching college football.

Having a guy isn't as much fun as you think. The "Wine and Dine" parts are great until you hit that comfortable spot. I sometimes MISS the single life.

Sincerely,
Lunasmom

Currently I don't even go out on dates. And when I do it seems like it ends badly. And I don't even really know why but I guess at some point I will atleast find mr right now. But I see that as pointless so I guess I shall stay single

Originally Posted by Tavia'smom

Okay I was thinking about this while at dinner last night. I am really tired of being single. And I want to know who else is tired of it.

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I am 22 and I have never been anything BUT single. Yes, yes, yes, I am tired of it.

I hope you don't mind another not-single person popping in here, but this really struck a chord with me.

I remember during the years I chose to quit dating, but knew I didn't want to be single, my friends would say "but why? enjoy being single! you really don't want to get married". I had a well paying career, owned my own home by age 35, had a great hobby of showing cats, was travelling up and down the east coast, by myself, doing so...but as I told them, that's fine for you to say, but I know what I want, and I want to be married. Not to just anyone, not for the sake of being married (i.e. I didn't just date to be dating), but to my soul mate.

I hated feeling like it was out of my hands. My gram who just passed away last month, was much more religious than I at the time, and her advice was to have faith. I found that incredibly hard to do when I was so unhappy, and unsure that I'd ever find the person I was seeking.

I do think when I met my dh, it was a case of I was ready to open up again, ready to take chances. I was actively seeking to change out of my very high stress hospital job to one where I could enjoy working with pregnant women but not be in that pressure cooker I'd been working in. I was willing to try...and that is exactly when I met my husband to be.

I took risks (was so sure I'd look like a fool), and found my gram had been right all along.

I never quite understood what it would mean to find and be in this kind of relationship..but it honestly is as if the fabric of who we are has been stitched together into someone/thing new. If he were to suddenly be gone, I think I'd have a hard time getting my equilibrium back, because it would be as if half of me had been amputated.

I can look back over a 10 year period and see exactly how each and every of a series of decisions led to my meeting dh. If I hadn't taken the time I needed to think about the mistakes I was making in dating, if I hadn't pursued my love of my cats into showing them, etc etc etc, we'd have never met.

So...my advice? Have faith, and fully live your life as it is now..just you. In doing what interests you, what is important to you, you have the best chance of meeting that soul mate.

I'm single, and no I'm not tired of it. I split from my ex almost 2 years ago and am happier now then I EVER was with him, even in the beginning. I have come to the conclusion that I am not really the type of person to get married, I am very my way or the highway, and that's not a good thing to be in a marriage. I just am not happy when I have to compromise I guess. Being by myself I can have as many cats as I want, have as many dirty dishes in my sink as I want, etc etc I've dated a bit and I do have a friend, but as far as a boyfirend? Don't need one and don't want one

I'm 44 and single (never married, but was engaged twice). My last long term relationship ended in 2001.

I don't mind being single. This might sound like ego talking, but I truly like my own company. It's taken me years to get to this point. I live alone with 2 cats and I'm rarely bored.

There are perks to being single:
- come and go as you please
- have the whole bed to yourself (well, if the cats aren't there)
- no need to consult anyone else for anything you want to do
- can stay up as late as I want and not worry about disturbing someone else.

There are also some drawbacks:
- an enjoyable evening of conversation
- help with the housework.

Being in a relationship takes a whole lot of effort and compromising. I'm quite selfish with my time and enjoy my alone time. If someone is around me too often I grow to resent them because I feel smothered. I just can't stand someone "underfoot" all of the time.

My ideal relationship would be with someone who travelled in their job a good percentage of the time.

Originally Posted by Pat & Alix

I
So...my advice? Have faith, and fully live your life as it is now..just you. In doing what interests you, what is important to you, you have the best chance of meeting that soul mate.

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and that is key. Be yourself do the things you enjoy, and the right person will be there god willing,

internet datting can work but just do it for fun, you may meet some cool people and some jerks of course.

how i was having fun and kinda had to dragged kicking and screaming to get married,
i dont reget it.

Originally Posted by Auntie Crazy

On the other hand, if God were to send someone my way, I wouldn't dismiss him out of hand. It would be delightful to have a man in my life who loves animals like I do, who shares my values and morals, and who would walk this road alongside of me. Although I am quite capable of handling the tough stuff, and I have plenty of laughter in my life, I truly believe that sharing a sorrow lessons the pain and sharing a joy doubles the delight. If a good guy came along, I would be just as happy to blend our lives together as I am now on my own.

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Well said. I feel the same way. I'm 36 and have always been single, and to be honest, I've never been in a serious relationship. When I was in my 20s, I was upset that I was missing something and that I was "falling behind" on the schedule that society (or our parents! ) wants us to keep.

Now well into my 30s, I am at peace with being single. I am happy and content on my own and if I am meant to meet a special someone, then it'll happen. I have my family and friends, and my best friend since grade school is more like a sister to me...and I have my furbabies...so I'm good.

One of my co-workers and I had a good conversation about the single life, and what we decided upon is the notion to NEVER believe that you have to have a man to "complete" you, but that having a relationship should ENHANCE the happiness you already have in your life.

Yeah I'm tired of it too. Its been a long time since I've met someone I've wanted to date. I have the friends trying to set me up, but that's not working. I need a gamer who'll play World of Warcraft with me.

I don't feel I NEED a man. I'd just like to met someone so I'm not so lonely sometimes.

How odd that I read this today - i have been single for a few years now, and am pretty much happy with it - I have so many friends either married or in relationships who tell me I dont need a man, but was watching Bridget Jones' Diary 2 last night and thought - would be nice to snuggled up to a man, yet i am snuggled up to a cat!! But, like some of the others on here, I am too used to my own company, and wouldn't be able to deal with someone wanting to know where I am, when I will be home, wanting to do soemthing when all I want to do is either sit in front of the comp or the TV etc, and if I ever did get serious with a bloke, they would have to accept not just my cats, but my fostering and the other bits I do for my charity - cos I can't see me ever not fostering.

Originally Posted by Auntie Crazy

By the way, for you single guys, I'm in my early 40's and I live in Central Massachusetts.

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And you can send any that don't fit your life over east to the Massachusetts coastline, and I'll try them on for size!

Well I thought I would pipe up...since I am notorious for being lonely...

I have to say I do love doing everything on my own terms and doing what I want when I want..

BUT, I do feel lonely alot because I do not have alot of friends around here..If I lived in my hometown where all my friends are, I wouldn't have time to feel lonely.

Sometimes I wish I had someone to share life with..its nice to feel loved and wanted by another human.

Plus, nothing beats the feeling of falling in love

Originally Posted by Trouts mom

Plus, nothing beats the feeling of falling in love

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Sounds to me like you need more chocolate!

Seriously, I agree with you, but it's the letdown AFTER that that I don't enjoy. You know, once you start to see what he is REALLY like, when he's no longer trying to impress you.

Ahhhh...I'm a cynic, LOL...


:::digs around for more chocolate:::

Originally Posted by Trouts mom

BUT, I do feel lonely alot because I do not have alot of friends around here..If I lived in my hometown where all my friends are, I wouldn't have time to feel lonely.

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Well that would depend, when itta goes back to indo she feels lonely without me there,
cause after a couple weeks her friends are back to dealing with there real lives, with there BF/husband, and she wants to come back to where i am again.

her being gone for a few months out of the year upsets her way more then it does me.
i am very good at finding things to keep myself busy.

and yes i talk to the cats

I personally am only 26 but have not had any single time since i was 14, it's mostly been just one long term relationship after another since then. I am finally ready to take a break. The thought of another relationship makes me gag right now, seriously. I supposed there will come a time when I'm interested in something again, but I can't forsee it anywhere in the near future. There are times when I am lonely but I don't long for a man, I usually just long for something to do. For me, men just complicate everything. I have compromised and compromised throughout my whole teenage years and early 20s, from where I was going to school, to what I was going to do for a career, where I was going to live, etc, to make relationships work. Well now, finally it's about ME. I hope it's not too late!!

Today is one of those days, when I miss having someone around. I left work early, because I am sick and it sure would be nice if someone ELSE was heating up the chicken soup and rubbing my back.