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Hi, I am new too!

post #1 of 4
Thread Starter 
I am so glad that I found this site. We have two kitty's Max & Mollie, they are brother & sister, and short haired and black, they were abandoned by their mom, and were rescued and that is how I got them. My husband & I just love them to bits.
Our one concern is Mollie she just does not like affection, I mean everything is on her terms and I know that that's the way it is w/a cat, but when we pick her up she pushes herself away from us, like she is afraid. I talk to her all the time and tell her we will never hurt her, and that we are only hugging her for a second, but she does not want that sort of attention. Max love's it, he's my cuddle cat!
I just feel that she was traumatized early on, and my hope is that if I just keep talking to her she may feel more secure w/us. They are inside cats.
We had a Big orange long hair boy cat, Ginger, He got very sick and we had to let him go, it crushed me & my husband. Ginger was an outside/inside cat and we decided that it is more safer to keep them inside. He was my husbands first pet! Can you imagine a 48 yr old who never had a pet, so it was important to get another cat for the both of us, and I always wanted two kittys. Such entertainment!
If anyone has any ideas on how I can make Mollie feel more secure and not mind a cuddle here & there we would love to hear from you.
Great Web Site!!
post #2 of 4
Your Molly sounds exactly like my Ophelia. The more I learn about ferals, the more I think Ophelia was raised by at least a semi-feral mom cat until she came into our lives. (She was stuck between the walls of our apartment building at about 6-8 weeks old, so we punched a hole in the wall and she has been with us since.) I am pretty sure, in my case, that we were the first humans she ever saw. I couldn't even touch her for about the first month we had her, until she saw Trent purring away getting snuggles. Then she was curious. Now, she wasn't anti-social per se. She would play with us, and loved to snuggle Trent. I guess all this is just to tell you that you are not alone. Some cats are just not affectionate the way we want them to be.

But there is hope! You don't say how old your two furbabes are, but from your post I think they are still kittens? It took a long time, but slowly showing her that we loved her and didn't push her limits she learned to trust us. She loves getting petted now, and she loves to sleep on a lap. She is Daddy's little girl, and he is the only one she will let pick her up. Even then sometimes she will struggle to get down NOW. It's only taken 3 years, but she will let me kiss her little head now without freaking out like I'm an axe murderer.

Basically, the only advice I have is to go only as far as she is comfortable. If she doesn't like to be picked up, don't. Pet her on her terms and soon she will trust you more and more, and give more and more affection to you.
post #3 of 4
Hi Stephanie!

Welcome to the Cat Site. As you've probably guessed, everyone here is really friendly and willing to share their experiences and answer your questions.

My Ivo also doesn't like to be picked up. She was a stray I took in a year ago. She'll push as far away from me as possible and struggle to get down. I don't let it bother me, however. She shows her affection in many other ways. She isn't a lap cat, but likes to sit by my feet when I'm on the couch. She follows me around my apartment and talks to me constantly. Every morning when I wake up, the first thing I HAVE to do is give her 10 or so minutes of pets and snuggles. So, although she doesn't like being held, I know she trusts and loves me. I'm sure you'll find the same with your Mollie.
post #4 of 4
Yes - I'll second that. Neither of my persians are especially 'cuddly'. They love a fuss and attention and stroking and rubbing and games, but the struggle when picked up. They've always been like that.

My ex-stray DSH is a nutter for cuddles. The minute you sit down he's in your lap or in your arms gazing into your face.

I guess all cats are different and you need to show Mollie care, love and affection in ways other than picking her up. Maybe one day she'll reward you by jumping into your lap . . .
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