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When Hallmark writers have a bad day...

post #1 of 19
Thread Starter 
Congratulations on your wedding.
Too bad no one likes your husband.

I have always wanted to have
Someone to hold.
Someone to love.
After having met you---
I've changed my mind.

I must admit, you brought religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.

Congratulations of your promotion.
Before you go.....
Would you like to take the knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.

Happy Friday, everyone from KittenKiya's Clan.
post #2 of 19
Those are cute!! Too bad they don't really make cards like that! I have had a few occasions where I could have really used them!!
post #3 of 19
THIS one does exist:

Money's tight,
Times are hard

HERE'S your ****ing Christmas card!
post #4 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by KittenKiya View Post
Happy Friday, everyone from KittenKiya's Clan.
....
Happy Friday you too Dear Janet!
and of course at your marvellous and wonderful Clan,

KITTENKIYA´S
post #5 of 19
Those are hilarious!


Quote:
Originally Posted by Phenomsmom View Post
Too bad they don't really make cards like that! I have had a few occasions where I could have really used them!!
Me, too!
post #6 of 19
Those are great! I swear they make a line of cards that are like that, I'll have to look....
post #7 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by katl8e View Post
THIS one does exist:

Money's tight,
Times are hard

HERE'S your ****ing Christmas card!
Can you buy this one in bulkIt's cheaper that way
post #8 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by katl8e View Post
THIS one does exist:

Money's tight,
Times are hard

HERE'S your ****ing Christmas card!
Quote:
Originally Posted by goosehazel View Post
Can you buy this one in bulkIt's cheaper that way

post #9 of 19
Thread Starter 
Found a few more:

As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am.....
That you're not here to ruin it for me.

Happy Birthday! You look great for your age.
Almost lifelike!

When we were together,
You always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your promise.

Your friends and I wanted to do
Something special for your birthday.
So we're having you put to sleep.
post #10 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by KittenKiya View Post
When we were together,
You always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your promise.
post #11 of 19
very cute!!!
post #12 of 19
Heh. Not that anybody's bitter or anything.

Love it.
post #13 of 19
Quote:
Congratulations on your wedding.
Too bad no one likes your husband.
Oh I could've used that for someone's wedding.
post #14 of 19
those are great
post #15 of 19
LOL those are great!!!!
I have one that says
It's your Birthday and you're a year older
ain't life a B****
post #16 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by katl8e View Post
THIS one does exist:

Money's tight,
Times are hard

HERE'S your ****ing Christmas card!
I have that one!
post #17 of 19
Those are funny
post #18 of 19
I also had a business card that said:

"Next time you park next to someone, leave a ****ing can opener so they can get out of thier car! Learn to drive ***"
post #19 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by goosehazel View Post
Can you buy this one in bulkIt's cheaper that way
I have a cardmaker program and can make mine as needed.
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