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neighbor died, can I take in a 3rd cat?

post #1 of 28
Thread Starter 
Hi everyone! My downstairs neighbor died and her cat was trapped in her apartment for 4 days after her death. Another neighbor managed to get the kittie into a crate, but cannot adopt her because of allegies. The cat is currently confined to a small room in his apartment. The dead neighbor's family does not want the cat. This is my question: I adopted 2 elderly sister cats 4 years ago--they are now 17 and in excellent health. One sister is very, very possesive and needy. Is there any way I could adopt my dead neighbor's cat without hurting the quality of life for my elderly cats? Thanks for a quick reply.
Ilsa
post #2 of 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by ilsalund View Post
Hi everyone! My downstairs neighbor died and her cat was trapped in her apartment for 4 days after her death. Another neighbor managed to get the kittie into a crate, but cannot adopt her because of allegies. The cat is currently confined to a small room in his apartment. The dead neighbor's family does not want the cat. This is my question: I adopted 2 elderly sister cats 4 years ago--they are now 17 and in excellent health. One sister is very, very possesive and needy. Is there any way I could adopt my dead neighbor's cat without hurting the quality of life for my elderly cats? Thanks for a quick reply.
Ilsa

Ilsa...welcome to TCS. What I would really suggest you do is set up this cat in a seperate room in your home....with ANY introductions, you need to take it slow and I would recommend that you get the cat vet checked prior to any introduction. Below is a link on introduction suggestions:

http://www.thecatsite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=67321

Katie
post #3 of 28
Thread Starter 
Thank you for your response and the link. Its information was very useful from a practical standpoint. However, do you think it is wise to introduce a year old cat, however slowly, to a household of 2 17 year old cats? A young cat's energy level is so different--would it enervating or upsetting to the elderly cats, in your opinion? I want to help the new cat, but I have to put my cats' needs first.
Ilsa
post #4 of 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by ilsalund View Post
Thank you for your response and the link. Its information was very useful from a practical standpoint. However, do you think it is wise to introduce a year old cat, however slowly, to a household of 2 17 year old cats? A young cat's energy level is so different--would it enervating or upsetting to the elderly cats, in your opinion? I want to help the new cat, but I have to put my cats' needs first.
Ilsa
Ilsa...that is a personal decision....but if it were me, I would be trying to find it a home via one of your friends or coworkers. 16 years is a huge age difference in cat years and I would be concerned that a new young cat would stress out your existing 2 cats and at their age..they probably don't need any stress.

There is a really good PDF called "how to find homes for homeless pets" that you can find here:

http://www.natewood.net/Rehome.html

It gives information on how to place ads and a sample contract.

It is VERY sweet that you want to help this cat.

Katie
post #5 of 28
Hi and welcome to TCS............you´ve joined us with an interesting question. I can relate my experience when I introduced a kitten to a 2 cat household

My existing 2 cats (Dino & Pepsi) were a little younger than yours (both about 10/11ish) but they had been together since kitten-hood, so I had the same worries as you.

I did the slow introduction, fed my newbie in her own room for about 2 weeks, then I started leaving her door open, the others would want to have a nosey and I monitored it very closely. She had her own cat-lit box and toys in the room.

If my newbie (Moofi) wanted a race around, I would put my others in another room whilst she had the run of the house. They didnt mind and usually fell asleep anyway

In time I moved Moofis feeding bowl closer and closer to my other two and that worked fairly well. They all realised they would get fed, so no battles ensued.

A couple of times she would want to play-fight, there was the odd spat or two, but generally cats do settle down to whose who and how to behave.

I totally agree that the slow introductions with monitoring was what worked with my crew ! It does take time and patience but its worth it when they are all buddies

Good Luck and keep us posted...................oh and some photos would be great when you get chance
post #6 of 28
I bought my Simba as a kitten, when my Senior cat Snoopy (now over The Rainbow Bridge) was 18 years old. Simba who is a hyper energy Bengal, never bothered Snoopy at all, of course I also had a 6 year old cat, (now 9) and Simba picked on him, and still does.

The thing is, Simba just seemed to know Snoopy was older and a lot more fragile, and they got along perfectly. I don't know if it was because there was another cat in the mix, though.
post #7 of 28
I adopeted a young male while I had an elderly female and I think it was a mistake. My old girl was miserable and the young cat would torment her. I had to keep them separated when I wasn't around. she stopped sitting with me on the couch. I recommend you find another home for the young cat. You will upset the balance you have now and the seniors will be very unhappy. I wish someone would have given me this advice when I asked.
post #8 of 28
I adopted Gracie as a kitten when my eldest, Sheba, was about 16 years old. I can't say they really "get along" (Sheba doesn't play well with others), but they mostly peacefully coexist, except when Sheba bullies the youngest one around. Gracie's probably close to 15 lbs, and Sheba's about 6 lbs, but she does not let the young'un bother her.
post #9 of 28
Thread Starter 
Thank you all so much for your thoughtful opinions! My neighbors who are keeping the cat temporarily have someone in Virginia who may be interested in taking her in. My neighbors have placed another cat with this man before and the cat lived to be 20, so I'm sure he'd be a good parent. If he does not take the cat, then I will discuss options with my neighbors. I'll post an update once a decision has been reached. I just want to say again how much I appreciate everyone's input. You've given me different perspectives to weigh into my situation. Bless you.
Ilsa
post #10 of 28
Thread Starter 
Thank all of you for your perspectives. It turns out that the choice came down to us taking the dead neighbor's cat or taking the cat to the pound, where she would be destroyed within a week. I fixed up our second bedroom as a safe room for the cat, who I named Clarie--her former human never named her--and she has tons of toys, food and attention. I give my 17 year old cats treats whenever they sniff at the door of Clarie's safe room, and I give Clarie treats when she smells the Girls from the other side. On Monday, Nov. 20, we will introduce Clarie, in her carrier, to the other cats and let them explore Clarie's room. So far, Clarie has bonded big time with my husband, but is wary of me, even though I am the one who feeds her. Her dead human was female, so Clarie just needs to adjust to another female who will not hurt or abandon her. She'll decide she likes me at her own pace. Again, thank you all for your advice. The result is that we have another member of our family, a domestic shorthair with golden eyes and black and white fur named Clarie. And we love her to pieces.
Ilsa
post #11 of 28
its just wonderful that you have taken Claire into your home and into your hearts. She sounds simply adorable

It will be a long process for you but it sounds to me that you have the patience for this to work. Please check in with us whenever you can and if we can help out with anything then we will surely do our best

good luck with the introductions on monday!
post #12 of 28
just checking in................aw, I was pleased to hear that you are keeping Claire, as you say the other options isnt worth thinking about She sounds such a peach, fancy her getting on so well with your man Sounds like you have it all sorted for the "intros" good luck for Monday, I am sure things will work out well, slowly but surely.
Once you get more settled maybe you could post some photos of Claire
We just love photos here

Have fun and good luck whizzing your way !!!
post #13 of 28
happy happy tears !!!

thank you so much for taking this cat and caring enough to even get
involved in making sure kitty was going to be okay.

a very touching story.

it always breaks my heart when someone passes away and the family
can't or won't take in that family members pet(s).

thanks to angels like you this kitty has no worries now.

post #14 of 28
Ilsa, I was just wondering if there were any updates on Claire?
post #15 of 28
Thread Starter 
We changed the spelling on her name because everyone saw "Clarie" as "Claire." Clary has been here in her new home for 2 1/2 months now, and she loves her older "sisters" very much. She pesters them to play with her, and they chase her away. Since her favorite game is Chase, she treats their irritation as a delightful game! The 2 elderly girls have adapted reasonably well at this point. The only time agressive behavior occurs is when Clary jumps out at them to play and scares them, or when Clary tries to enter the living room. For some reason, they accept her presence in every other room, but the living room is forbidden territory. But Clary still tries to go in, partly because she wants to be with the other cats, but mostly because they will chase her when she comes in, and she adores being chased! Clary decided she would allow me to be her Mommy on the fourth day she was here, and that thrilled me so much! She is mellow, very social and loving, but she has a biting problem. I think someone played roughly with her when she was a kitten--she thinks fingers are toys. She doesn't bite hard, but it is a habit I am trying to break her of. So, thanks much to all of you who gave such helpful advice!!! Because of your guidance, we now have a delightful new member of our family. I apologise for not posting a picture. I don't know how to do it here. If I can figure it out, I'll post pictures of all the girls.
post #16 of 28
Posting pictures is pretty easy.

Upload your pictures to the internet. Many people use a place called "photobucket". You can also use the space provided by your ISP.

Once you have the picture uploaded, copy the whole address for the picture that shows in your address bar.

Come here and make a new thread. In the typing window menu you will see some icons. Here you have a choise.

1. Post just the link to the pictures.
- To do that you click on the world/globe icon and paste in the URL to your picture. Click "OK" and it will show up in the typing window with some BBC code tags in front and at the end of the link.

2. Post the picture.
- To do that you use the yellow "envelope" looking icon with a mountain and sun in it. Click that, and paste in your URL to your picture. Click OK. You picture will show up in the typing window.

Repeat each of those steps for whatever amount of pictures or links you want to post.
post #17 of 28
What a love you are. If you run into any questions or problems, were are ALWAYS here for you.

How sweet you are.
post #18 of 28
Ilsa, what a sweet story!

Thank you so much for taking in this kitty - and thank you so much for sharing the story and providing updates!

Laurie
post #19 of 28
That's so wonderful that she's adjusting well!
post #20 of 28
that is a wonderful wonderful update !!! thank you so much !!

by the way where in NY are you ? manhattan ? i am on long island.
post #21 of 28
thankyou so much for giving us an update I am so pleased to read that everything is going sooooo well!! how marvellous

funny how the older cats accept her in every other room but the living room. Cats are so interesting!

I hope that everything continues on so well
post #22 of 28
thanks for the updates, its always nice to know ! especially when things have worked out so well for you all
I´ll keep my eyes open for some photos, shes sounds a real cutie
post #23 of 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by mooficat View Post
thanks for the updates, its always nice to know ! especially when things have worked out so well for you all
I´ll keep my eyes open for some photos, shes sounds a real cutie
That is really good news
post #24 of 28
Thread Starter 
Thank you all for your dear words of support as we continue to adapt this new wonderful creature into our home. Thanks very much to the person who gave instructions on how to post pictures. I'm afraid the instructions read like Sanskrit to me, but my husband is working on it and I am confident he will figure out how to do this. The second he does, we will post pix of Clary and the other two girls. Clary continues to delight us, and suprisingly her elderly "sisters" grow more tolerant and accepting of her each day. We live in an apartment building, (in Queens, for the person from LI who asked) so all of the girls love to stroll "outside," meaning out in the hallway. All of our neighbors on our floor and the floor below have met all of our girls at this point, and each cat loves to run up to a neighbor for a hello and a pat. It is so cute to see all three in the hall gathered around the elevator waiting for a human to come out, eager for the patting to begin. I am so grateful that all of our neighbors allow the girls to roam the halls for brief periods, under constant supervision of course, with great good humor. Hubby says he will crack the picture posting very soon, and then I will show pictures of all three. Again, thanks to all of you wonderful people for your advice and support!!!
post #25 of 28
awwwww it all sounds just wonderful

looking forward to seeing some pictures. If you (or your husband) needs further help send me a pm and I can walk you through it
post #26 of 28
How sweet that Clarey is part of the "pets" gang now! Your neighbors must enjoy them - and it sounds so cute!

Thank you (again) so much for taking in this sweet girl. She sounds like a delight - and I'm just so happy the other girls are being such good big sisters!

Laurie
post #27 of 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by ilsalund View Post
Hubby says he will crack the picture posting very soon, and then I will show pictures of all three


oooo..............ooo photos ! cant wait, no pressure honestly
post #28 of 28
I am so glad that you adopted this precious little kitty, and I am glad that the older cats get along with her.

Please keep us updated on how she is doing too.

Your neighbors all sound like wonderful people.
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