Honey, I think that if you talked to everyone on this site, they would tell you that they also feel your pain. We all have lost a wonderful friend and companion and lover.
One of the wonderful things about this Site is that when you need it the most, people are here for you. They understand what you are going through. I've heard it said before, "Oh, what's the matter with you, that's just an animal?" and YOU and I know that that is not the truth. An intelligent being has chosen to be by your side and live with you and love you.
We all care about each other here. You will always have a shoulder or two, and ear or two, or whatever else you need.
Happy that you are back headbuts and soothing, soothing licks from KittenKiya's Clan.