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I need some major vibes right now
- Thread starter starryeyedtiger
- Start Date
Nikki, just a thought... you REALLY may want to be careful with what you are putting in your thread. You have a lot of personal info in it. I am not sure if you are using real names or not but mentioning the department Colin works for, especially under these circumstances and considering his line of work... These things always stick out at me and I just want to remind you how dangerous that can be
I really hope that everything works out for you guys... Just try to keep an open mind about it. I am leaning towards it being something other than him actully going to the strip club. It seems to me if he were being sneaky about it he would have burned those free passes and let a friend hang on to them. They wouldn't be in the house for you to find.
I really hope that everything works out for you guys... Just try to keep an open mind about it. I am leaning towards it being something other than him actully going to the strip club. It seems to me if he were being sneaky about it he would have burned those free passes and let a friend hang on to them. They wouldn't be in the house for you to find.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #43
oh i'm soo sorry! i was soo upset i didn't even think about it. I will definitely edit that out now.Originally Posted by squirtle
Nikki, just a thought... you REALLY may want to be careful with what you are putting in your thread. You have a lot of personal info in it. I am not sure if you are using real names or not but mentioning the department Colin works for, especially under these circumstances and considering his line of work... These things always stick out at me and I just want to remind you how dangerous that can be
I really hope that everything works out for you guys... Just try to keep an open mind about it. I am leaning towards it being something other than him actully going to the strip club. It seems to me if he were being sneaky about it he would have burned those free passes and let a friend hang on to them. They wouldn't be in the house for you to find.
Nikki, just lending some moral support. I'm unfortunately more cynical since I've had a couple of bad experiences with cheating partners, so I'm just going to say I really hope you guys work it out, and that the people here are awesome, so you've got a great support group!
&
- Kim
I may be a little late but sending you some good vibes
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #46
Thankyou Kim I really appreciate your kind words and support.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #48
Thanks for all of the sweet words and good advice everyone. I'm working on the whole "calm" thing at the moment. (What i'd really like to do is play my drum kit and sing at the top of my lungs lol....but I wouldn't want to wake the neighbors. Wow, I'd kill for a studio room right now lol...sometimes I miss being a music industry major
..) Humm...right now i'm watching tv and fosters is keeping me company, so I'm feeling a bit better at the moment. Hopefully the rest of my night will be good
I'll plan on posting on TCS a few minutes more and then I will get ready for bed. Thankyou again everyone for being so nice.
Nikki I dont really know what to say other then I hope your talk with Colin goes well and that you are in my thoughts.
LOL! My piano teacher used to say I played best when I had just had a fight with my dad.Originally Posted by StarryEyedTiGeR
...(What i'd really like to do is play my drum kit and sing at the top of my lungs lol....but I wouldn't want to wake the neighbors. Wow, I'd kill for a studio room right now lol...sometimes I miss being a music industry major..)
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #52
Oh my gosh, i'm the same way- emotions really make my music sound incredable....sad, happy, angry- you can hear it in my music- it's such a powerful thing. I love expressing myself through the art of music- it's awesome
As for staying out late that night, sometimes guys are just a little thick-headed when it comes to how we feel about things. Maybe he thought that since you were sick that night, that you would be sleeping and not mind that he was out so late, and maybe he even thought that it would be better if he let you rest and not disturb you while you were sleeping. Even though we would hope that our SOs would want to stay home and take care of us, sometimes guys just don't see it that way.
I hope that things work out alright. Feel free to PM or message me if you need someone to talk to. I've been through my own share of being lied to by the guy you thought you were going to marry, so I know how you're probably feeling right now. I'm hoping, along with you, that there is a good reason for all this.
I am glad you are ok,
i did not read, what everone else has said here but really i dont think many people here will care that you worked as a stripper
. Heck i was DJ and bouncer at one during my college days. (hey 250 a week under the table as a student is killer money) Having worked in one off and on for 4 years, Free pass get handed out like candy, and even more so to police(or to big tough looking guys that are cool) The thinking at the place i was at is that police even off duty ones there = less trouble.
I can understand, that you dislike those places, and he should have respected your feeling about going, Just ask him when he gets back if he went, and remind him how it makes you feel him going there. Let him explain if he went and why( no yelling or throwing things please). Just remind him how those types of places make you feel, Then it is up to you to judge his answers.
Like the girls night out, guys need a guys night out. yes some guys do like to look at women dancing. Just like i remember some posts around here of women going to male dance shows, or getting excited about cute sales guys at work
99.9% of the guys that go to those places are coming home alone, how in a normal bar if they were looking to pick up someone there chances would be much higher. I would bet if you think back to that very short time you worked in the type of business, most of the ladies just wanted to get home, and out of those shoes
I can see why the door opening would scare you so bad.even more so with his job. But there are alot of reasons why, such as my door opener will also open my aunts door in WVA. Could be someone driving around just playing around with the one in there car, and chance just caused it to open. But you did the right thing and having people come check it out.
Anytime you need to talk late at night, i am normally around. just send me a message.
take care, and good luck
i did not read, what everone else has said here but really i dont think many people here will care that you worked as a stripper
I can understand, that you dislike those places, and he should have respected your feeling about going, Just ask him when he gets back if he went, and remind him how it makes you feel him going there. Let him explain if he went and why( no yelling or throwing things please). Just remind him how those types of places make you feel, Then it is up to you to judge his answers.
Like the girls night out, guys need a guys night out. yes some guys do like to look at women dancing. Just like i remember some posts around here of women going to male dance shows, or getting excited about cute sales guys at work
I can see why the door opening would scare you so bad.even more so with his job. But there are alot of reasons why, such as my door opener will also open my aunts door in WVA. Could be someone driving around just playing around with the one in there car, and chance just caused it to open. But you did the right thing and having people come check it out.
Anytime you need to talk late at night, i am normally around. just send me a message.
take care, and good luck
Ha ha. Now I just use that little bit of stage fright I usually get to make me have that extra "edge". Seriously, good luck...Originally Posted by StarryEyedTiGeR
Oh my gosh, i'm the same way- emotions really make my music sound incredable....sad, happy, angry- you can hear it in my music- it's such a powerful thing. I love expressing myself through the art of music- it's awesome
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #56
Thanks so much for your input! It's good to hear something from a guys perspective. And I agree with you - the money is definitely good....on a good night i'd come home with $500. But it just wasn't worth it to me to stay in that line of work. And the shoes- yea, they hurt!/ But that aside, yeah, when it comes down to it....he should not have those in his house when he is in a committed relationship with me, and especially since he knew about my past and why I don't approve of it- he willingly decided not to go when we first meet...out of respect to me, I never forced him not to go- he choose to not to on his own- and i respected him for that. But now that i've found 13 free passes....my respect for him is out the window. I still love him - no doubt of that- but i'm upset with what he's "hiding". Also, at the club I worked at and the one that the free passes are too- they do not like cops...cops slow their business down...and are pretty much "not welcome there" in uniform. Also, those clubs are out of his jurisdiction and in another city...so i'm still trying to figure out when he could have possible gone. I can only think of one or two times....but i'm not going to accuse him of going if i'm not for certain he did. I want him to feel comfortable enough around me that he can be honest and talk to me about it. We never really fight..we certainly never scream or throw things, we always sit in the floor facing each other and talk (sounds kinda weird, but it works for us- both of us hate screaming and anything like that...and besides you don't accomplish anything screaming and throwing fits, you accomplish much more if you're able to communicate like responsible adultsOriginally Posted by theimp98
I am glad you are ok,
i did not read, what everone else has said here but really i dont think many people here will care that you worked as a stripper. Heck i was DJ and bouncer at one during my college days. (hey 250 a week under the table as a student is killer money) Having worked in one off and on for 4 years, Free pass get handed out like candy, and even more so to police(or to big tough looking guys that are cool) The thinking at the place i was at is that police even off duty ones there = less trouble.
I can understand, that you dislike those places, and he should have respected your feeling about going, Just ask him when he gets back if he went, and remind him how it makes you feel him going there. Let him explain if he went and why( no yelling or throwing things please). Just remind him how those types of places make you feel, Then it is up to you to judge his answers.
Like the girls night out, guys need a guys night out. yes some guys do like to look at women dancing. Just like i remember some posts around here of women going to male dance shows, or getting excited about cute sales guys at work99.9% of the guys that go to those places are coming home alone, how in a normal bar if they were looking to pick up someone there chances would be much higher. I would bet if you think back to that very short time you worked in the type of business, most of the ladies just wanted to get home, and out of those shoes
I can see why the door opening would scare you so bad.even more so with his job. But there are alot of reasons why, such as my door opener will also open my aunts door in WVA. Could be someone driving around just playing around with the one in there car, and chance just caused it to open. But you did the right thing and having people come check it out.
Anytime you need to talk late at night, i am normally around. just send me a message.
take care, and good luck
I think things will be just fine. It sounds like you love eachother alot. And he does still have 13. So thats 13 that he didnt use. You dont know he had more that he used. Try to be positive.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #58
Thanks Amber- I appreciate it.Originally Posted by 4crazycats
I think things will be just fine. It sounds like you love eachother alot. And he does still have 13. So thats 13 that he didnt use. You dont know he had more that he used. Try to be positive.As for your life being a Soap Opera join my club. You get used to it.
I hope whatever is troubling you works out Okay in the end. Usually it does....
Good vibes are headed your way from me!
Hey Nikki,
I wanted to post a thought. You said his desk was new, could he have possibly had a stack of papers, somewhere else, that included these passes from way back in his past, that he just grabbed and put in his new desk, not remembering they were even there?
Good luck, Sweetie, you have received solid advice from a lot of people and along with sharp thinking yourself, you will figure out exactly what to do.
I wanted to post a thought. You said his desk was new, could he have possibly had a stack of papers, somewhere else, that included these passes from way back in his past, that he just grabbed and put in his new desk, not remembering they were even there?
Good luck, Sweetie, you have received solid advice from a lot of people and along with sharp thinking yourself, you will figure out exactly what to do.
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