TheCatSite.com › Forums › General Forums › The Cat Lounge › 'Cuz Breakin' Up is hard to do..
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

'Cuz Breakin' Up is hard to do..

post #1 of 25
Thread Starter 
Hey all...
Just had to pop in & let you all know some stuff.
Well I THOUGHT I was going to be staying in my apartment, but he decided to not let that happen. He's pretty much kicked me out persay.
I've already called the landlord & stuff, and the landlord said that whoever has the kid should stay there, well the ex said no way.
If I were to stay stubborn about it, we'd be living here forever together because he's just as stubborn as me. Ugh..What a loser.
ANYWAYS-so I've got to move BACK into my moms house, (well there's an apartment above her house that I'll be moving into), untill I can find a decent place for me & my daughter.
I find myself being sad in the mornings, but as the day goes on, I realize how awesome I am, and all that sadness just goes away. I'm one hot mama, and he's one not-awesome guy, we just don't belong together.

So umm...I'm still like half-away from TCS, because I'm probably not going to go get the internet at my moms, but she's got a computer that I have access to, so I will for sure stop in when available. I miss you guys terribly.
I think I might like this breaking up this time. It's amazing how much stronger I've made myself. 'Tis hard, but well worth it.
Thank you guys...Love you all.
TO MY SS:My package can still be sent to the address given, as I will be there everyday to drop my daughter off while I work. So that's ok..I just don't want to give out my mom's address if I'm not going to be there long.
Stay happy guys, and can someone like make me a list of all the cool things I miss? Keep me updated..like a secretary type deal?

BY THE WAY-
I am losing Kipper. The Ex had originally said I could keep them both, but then his mother said that I can't take Kipper, and that she'll be buying his food/litter etc..
I am really kind of mad about this, I will still see him alot though. Can you take someone to court for your cat?
post #2 of 25
I'm sorry you have to move out.But, you are so much better off without him and you sound soooooooooooo happy!!!
You are lucky that you figured out how to make yourself happy as soon as you did.
Good luck sweetie and keep your head up............in a few weeks,he'll be just a distant memory.(as your former BF that is)
post #3 of 25
Stay strong Leah you are awesome!! and you can do this!!! We all love you!!!
post #4 of 25
Aww sweetie - I'm sorry to hear that now you have to move out. He's so NOT awesome! But you.... you are being so strong and staying awesome and totally being the grown up here, which is just what you need to be for your daughter. I'm also glad to hear that she will be coming with you

I'm soooo sorry to hear that you won't be keeping Kipper - about the court thing - I'm not sure about that? But I'm sure someone here will know more about that stuff.

Good luck with everything, keep in touch - stay strong girl!
post #5 of 25
What a difficult time for you

I'm not too sure about the Kipper stuff, but I do wish you the best of luck!
post #6 of 25
I am so sorry you're going through this. I am glad you are able to take your daughter with you and hopefully they'll let you take Kipper. Is he originally yours? if he is, you have every right to take him..but I am really not sure about taking them to court about getting him back.
keep your chin up and remember we all love you!
post #7 of 25
I think that if you can prove that you bought him,or his food,was in charge of paying his Vet bills and etc. you can take your ex to small claims court.NOT SURE though!!
You can always call your court house and ask them.
Good luck and stay strong.You have soooooo many here pulling for you and your DD!! HUGS!!!
post #8 of 25
Thread Starter 
Aaaawww...
I'm gonna like vote TCS as the best support group of all time or something.
I'm doing some packing now, I wont be staying here tonight.
He's going a little crazy. He's posted some awful things on his Myspace about me, and I'd like to ring his neck off.
I'm probably going to end up getting a restraining order against him because well..He's just going plain nuts. It's undescribable how crazy he's acting, I hope he stops soon. Like I fear for my life at points in the day, but I havent told anyone that yet, so Shhhh...Don't tell my mother.
Um-Kipper is ours. We both were there when we adopted him. Mushi is mine, I went & got him for myself.
But I have paid for all of Kippers stuff, and vet bills. It's all under my name. Kipper even has my last name on his papers at the vet.
It's my ex's mother thats acting crazy about him keeping Kipper, she seems to think Kipper is his. And that he doesnt belong with me. But I would love Kipper more. My ex says he doesnt mind keeping kipper because he needs the company.
So we'll see.
Thank you all. I hope to see your posts soon.
(I was going to say see you all soon, but it's not like I can actually see you all, so I said posts..I crack myself up! )
post #9 of 25
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by babyharley View Post
He's so NOT awesome!
You KNOW I love that.
post #10 of 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilleah View Post
I'm one hot mama...
We already knew that

Quote:
Originally Posted by lilleah View Post
I am really kind of mad about this, I will still see him alot though. Can you take someone to court for your cat?
I'm sure you could but I don't know what sort of proof, etc you need for ownership.

So congrats on moving up and onward. We'll be here when you settle down again.
post #11 of 25
Just a little side note- if you feel like you need a restraining order against him - instead, go to your local police dpt and take out an "Order of Protection"...it does essentially the same thing as a restraining order- but better, and law enforcement enfores it better and more strictly- you will be safe with that. You are being soo strong Leah! Keep your chin up sweetie! Also, if you get the order, make sure you get one for your daughter too and have copies of ALL of your bills, pictures of everything you bought for your apartment on your own or in your name, etc, stuff like that ....you will need it in the future if you have to go to court. Document, document, document!!! also, if you have a joint savings account- get rid of it and take what's yours so he can't access your money or your credit cards, or anytihng like that. Good luck sweetheart!
post #12 of 25
The only problem with the restraining order is your DD.If you have to drop her off to him, then you will be considered breaking it yourself.I know, it's a bunch of BS!! But, that's how it works.The only way I was told you can get around that, is to drop her off with someone that you trust and have him come and get her.Then have him drop her off.
As for crazy talk,I've been through it also.I was told all kinds of stuff.Like "if I can't have you,I'll kill you and then myself".Or "who wants you?""I'm nothing without you and if you leave,I'll shoot myself".You name it,I heard it.
It took him holding a loaded shot gun to my head in FRONT of my DD who was only 4 at the time.That was it and I left.He shoved pills down my throat,took a razor blade to my wrist,the gun,black eyes,broken bones, and a bunch of other things.Including causing me to go into preterm labor with our DS.
I'm happy you got out before it got too bad.You are a WONDERFUL MOM!!
post #13 of 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by crittermom View Post
The only problem with the restraining order is your DD.If you have to drop her off to him, then you will be considered breaking it yourself.I know, it's a bunch of BS!! But, that's how it works.The only way I was told you can get around that, is to drop her off with someone that you trust and have him come and get her.Then have him drop her off.
As for crazy talk,I've been through it also.I was told all kinds of stuff.Like "if I can't have you,I'll kill you and then myself".Or "who wants you?""I'm nothing without you and if you leave,I'll shoot myself".You name it,I heard it.
It took him holding a loaded shot gun to my head in FRONT of my DD who was only 4 at the time.That was it and I left.He shoved pills down my throat,took a razor blade to my wrist,the gun,black eyes,broken bones, and a bunch of other things.Including causing me to go into preterm labor with our DS.
I'm happy you got out before it got too bad.You are a WONDERFUL MOM!!
Wow....sweetie, sounds like you were put through the mill! I'm soo glad you and your children got out of there no person deserves to be subjected to that kind of mistreatment and abuse ever. Thankfully now you are safe with your wonderful family and have a loving man if your life now
post #14 of 25
I never wish what I went through for other women.And I'm so happy to hear that they get out BEFORE it gets that bad like Leah.I applaud her for her bravery!!
Thanks Nikki!! Shawn is the BEST and I wouldn't trade him for ALL the $$ in the World.
post #15 of 25
Oh Leah, I am so proud of you. It is hard sometimes in these situations to realize your worth alot more than a relationship like you had. I'm glad that you know you are AWESOME!! Cuz you totally are

Hopefully you get you and your daughter situated nicely in your very own place, and then you will feel like the most independant woman in the world Who needs a stinky guy anyways?? Not you!!

Anyway, hopefully he doesn't keep Kipper, that would be pretty awful for you to give Kipper up..

Well, as you probably know, I just went through a pretty emotional breakup myself, so if you ever need to talk, you can PM me
post #16 of 25
Stay strong Leah! He's just trying to make everything difficult for you so you give up and just stay, but who wants to stay with a so not awesome guy?? It'll get better as soon as you get out of there, it sucks that you still have to have contact with him for your daughter, but hopefully he'll soon move on, but who can blame for going nuts when he's losing the best thing that will ever happen to him??
post #17 of 25
I think you can go to court for your kitty. If you have proof of who was the primary care taker.
post #18 of 25
What would happen if you just took Kipper with you? Where did he come from...a shelter? Whose name is on the paperwork(if there is any) that came with the adoption/purchase?
post #19 of 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by crittermom View Post
I never wish what I went through for other women.And I'm so happy to hear that they get out BEFORE it gets that bad like Leah.I applaud her for her bravery!!
Thanks Nikki!! Shawn is the BEST and I wouldn't trade him for ALL the $$ in the World.
No problem. I definitely think you're a brave woman for leaving an abusive situation. I also applaud Leah for being an aweosme momma and woman to figure out what's best for her and her little one.
post #20 of 25
Oh Leah!
I'm sorry it didn't work out. I know you wanted it to after last time, but if he's behaving like this then you're better off out of the situation.
I would say since you've paid for things it's not fair of him to keep Kipper. Plus why would he want to separate Kipper from Mushi? They need each others company!
You are so strong, I really admire you. And you are awesome!
I hope things get a little easier for you soon, and I hope he calms down and becomes more reasonable about things
post #21 of 25
Good luck and stay strong. And I would say do not do anything that jeopardises your daughter in any way, including her future relationship with her father, if he wants one. You could regret that so much in the future. But on Kipper, why not offer to get him another kitten to keep him company, using hte argument that Mushi and Kipper need each other. That is staying calm and amiable while getting what you want.
post #22 of 25
*Hugs*

I'm glad to read this, though:

Quote:
I find myself being sad in the mornings, but as the day goes on, I realize how awesome I am, and all that sadness just goes away. I'm one hot mama, and he's one not-awesome guy, we just don't belong together.
I'm glad you realize it...because you ARE awesome and you don't need him. Stay strong and keep that attitude, it'll help you through all this hard stuff.
post #23 of 25
I don't have much more to add than what has all ready been said, but why don't you just take Kipper with you? Make him fight to keep her if he wants to, not the other way around. I wouldn't leave her with someone who is unstable right now...
post #24 of 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilleah View Post
I find myself being sad in the mornings, but as the day goes on, I realize how awesome I am, and all that sadness just goes away. I'm one hot mama, and he's one not-awesome guy, we just don't belong together.
What an incredible and inspiring attitude to have- it'll take you far!!
I'm so sorry to hear about your breakup (esp. because you have a daughter that has to move, too, AND about Kipper ), but your wonderful attitude is such an asset to have right now. I wish you nothing but luck and happiness during this time!

ETA: Just read about the restraining order thing. That COULD work in your favor with regards to Kipper. I know here in GA you CAN include pets in a restraining order if you feel for your safety. Standards may be different in your state, but it's worth looking into. Contact your local domestic violence shelter as they should be able to give you some guidance in that area!
post #25 of 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by crittermom View Post
The only problem with the restraining order is your DD.If you have to drop her off to him, then you will be considered breaking it yourself.I know, it's a bunch of BS!! But, that's how it works.The only way I was told you can get around that, is to drop her off with someone that you trust and have him come and get her.Then have him drop her off.
As for crazy talk,I've been through it also.I was told all kinds of stuff.Like "if I can't have you,I'll kill you and then myself".Or "who wants you?""I'm nothing without you and if you leave,I'll shoot myself".You name it,I heard it.
It took him holding a loaded shot gun to my head in FRONT of my DD who was only 4 at the time.That was it and I left.He shoved pills down my throat,took a razor blade to my wrist,the gun,black eyes,broken bones, and a bunch of other things.Including causing me to go into preterm labor with our DS.
I'm happy you got out before it got too bad.You are a WONDERFUL MOM!!
Wow, you are a SURVIVOR! I am so glad you're out of that relationship and SAFE now! You are an inspiration for others who may be in similar situations.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: The Cat Lounge
TheCatSite.com › Forums › General Forums › The Cat Lounge › 'Cuz Breakin' Up is hard to do..