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Eternal Truths

post #1 of 4
Thread Starter 
My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.

It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.

If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.

A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.

Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.

Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.

There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.

Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.

Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
post #2 of 4
How true! Especially the one about forgiveness, that's kind of my motto when unsure what to do.
post #3 of 4
Those really are "Eternal Truths"

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
That reminds me of one time when my best friend and I actually rationalized that Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream was in fact a nutritionally sound dinner. Of course, we were laughing the whole time we ate it!
post #4 of 4
I'm sure the "truth" works just as well if you subsitute "spoon of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream" for "cookie"!

These are great! Thanks for sharing - we can always use a good laugh!

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