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Males vs. Females?

post #1 of 24
Thread Starter 
Hello,
I would like to hear peoples' experiences with male cats, or what you think the differences are between males and females? Especially with cats who are spayed/neutered early...
I've only had female cats and I was going to get another female but the breeder whose waiting list I was on does not have any females in the litter that are what I'm looking for, only males... I'm a little hesitant to get a male because of the horror stories I've heard about spraying cats and stuff, and since I've never had one before... The kittens are neutered before they are adopted out.
post #2 of 24
I've had cats for about 30 yrs. My first one was a neutered male about 3 yrs old. IMO I'd take a male over a female any day - and this goes for both mixed breeds or pedigree.

Every male I've had never sprayed, and was the most loving, outgoing cat. I even had a whole male that never sprayed in the house - he was as loving/social as his neutered "brothers".

On the other hand, I've only had one or two females that had an outgoing personality - most of the females are more territorial with other females, not as social/outgoing and the show quality ones didn't like showing - all my males did tho.

Right now we have a female HHP who's pretty opinionated, and a female dog. But we plan on getting a neutered male Ocicat when one is available. Our 15 yr rex (who was one of the most loving males) died from a heart attack last week. I'm sure an Ocicat will be in the family within a few years
post #3 of 24
You should be fine with a neutered male cat.

I have a female who is the sweetest, gentlest little thing; and my neighbours upstairs have a huge gentle giant of a neutered male who is much milder-mannered than their two females, who are nevertheless friendly to each other and to me (they don't like the male.)

I don't see anything particularly special about the sexes; it has more to do with the individual cat and whether or not it was neutered early.
post #4 of 24
Actually I think getting a male is a better idea for you. The chances of opposite sexes getting along are better. I have 4 females and 1 male. My male gets along with all 4 females but 2 of the females do not get along. The females dont furball fight but they do hiss at each other and try to avoid being in the same room together. All of my cats are fixed and non of them spray.
post #5 of 24
I am all for males too. My females are all moody and territorial and take a lot longer time to adjust to new situations, to new people in the house and even to each other. My males are such good, well behaved cats and are very laid back and accepting of new things. I personall,y prefer males. I have never had a male cat who sprayed. Esdpecially if you are getting a younger kitten who is already neutered young. I would go for a male.

Also so you know, females can spray too. One of my females was a sprayer but I didn't spay her until around a year old, before I knew better.
post #6 of 24
I have a male and female kittens the male is much more affectionate than the female and tidier too when the female kitten uses the litter tray she builds mount everest with snow falls 18 inches outside the box lol
post #7 of 24
Not that it matters, I'm just curious, what type of cat are you willing to get?
I have 2 males and 1 female. In fact the female is more territoral and moody, the males are 1 and half years and the other 7 months. The males are absolutely kind and like to be petted all the time. But I dont't think it's about sexes, each cat has it's own persoanlity.
post #8 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by soxinabox View Post
I have a male and female kittens the male is much more affectionate than the female and tidier too when the female kitten uses the litter tray she builds mount everest with snow falls 18 inches outside the box lol

My kittens are the opposite of yours then llooll.... they leave everthing uncevered, just pop and leave
post #9 of 24
Why don't you meet the kittens and see if you bond with any of them first?

In my opinion male cats are more of a risk, however having said that some of the nicest cats I know are male. ( My three are female). The main reasons I say it is risky to own a male cat are as follows.
Even after neutering male cats roam a much wider territory than females, meaning there is a higher chance they will run into trouble.
Male cats may still spray their territory after neutering, although this can happen to females too but is much more unlikely and less frequent.
Male cats are more likely to display agressive behaviour. (I have not observed this one myself, but I have read it enough times to believe it)

I hope that helps you choose. It's a shame but there are no solid answers here, it's a personal decision.
post #10 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by H3_six View Post
Why don't you meet the kittens and see if you bond with any of them first?

In my opinion male cats are more of a risk, however having said that some of the nicest cats I know are male. ( My three are female). The main reasons I say it is risky to own a male cat are as follows.
Even after neutering male cats roam a much wider territory than females, meaning there is a higher chance they will run into trouble.
Male cats may still spray their territory after neutering, although this can happen to females too but is much more unlikely and less frequent.
Male cats are more likely to display agressive behaviour. (I have not observed this one myself, but I have read it enough times to believe it)

I hope that helps you choose. It's a shame but there are no solid answers here, it's a personal decision.
There cannot be a solid answer when it totally depends on each individual cat. How the cat is treated and it's environment and the people in it's lives down to every little detail make a complete difference at times. There cannot possibly be a solid answer ever. IMO.
post #11 of 24
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by H3_six View Post
Why don't you meet the kittens and see if you bond with any of them first?

Well, there are only male kittens in the current litter I was considering, and only one is the color we were looking for... I don't know if I will be able to meet with the kittens first because they ask for a deposit to "reserve" a kitten and if you don't put a deposit someone else can reserve the kitten. If I wait too long (until the kittens are old enough that they would even pay attention to people let alone bond) they will probably all be reserved.

Oh someone asked about breed-- the breed is Maine Coon.
post #12 of 24
Oh dear that's a shame for you. I didn't realise this was the case, I have never aquired a pure bred cat myself. However my boxer dog was from a breeder, it does seem a very cold way to find a pet. However, do not worry cats are very intelligent if you choose to take a kitten, then I am sure with love and affection it will grow into a beautiful adult.
post #13 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nekochan View Post
Well, there are only male kittens in the current litter I was considering, and only one is the color we were looking for... I don't know if I will be able to meet with the kittens first because they ask for a deposit to "reserve" a kitten and if you don't put a deposit someone else can reserve the kitten. If I wait too long (until the kittens are old enough that they would even pay attention to people let alone bond) they will probably all be reserved.

Oh someone asked about breed-- the breed is Maine Coon.
I'm not such an expert on maine coons, but I heard of many people with all types of cats that had problems with both intergating males and females. So as I said before its not a sexes problem. You can get either a male or a female to your family there and have problems, or on the contrary they will get along just fine. I know what you mean about the deposit and everything, you decide what you really would like then, male or female and go with luck I guess. If I remeber well you said they are 8 months old? I think they are young enough to accept the new comer. Good luck
post #14 of 24
I have a opinion based totally on observation that many might disagree with but...

During the past year I have visited countless forums and it seems that cats who inappropriately pee in the house (not spray) are more often female then male. I have also observed this to be true with the people I know that have cats. My only explanation would be that, as someone stated above, females cat may become stressed more easily then males.

Anybody agree with this?

That being said I got a male because most people say they are more loving. A family member took my boy's sister and she is at least if not more loving then my boy. May be a fluke though!
post #15 of 24
Thread Starter 
No they are not 8 months, the kittens are only about 2 weeks old currently... My other cat I have (female) is about 12 years old but we've only had her 2 years.
post #16 of 24
We have six cats. Our experience is that how loving and cuddly they are totally depends on the cat, not the sex. However, the girls definitely seem to attach more to one person than another (though they love us both). The girls, in our experience, are far more jealous, and, again, in our experience it is much more difficult to integrate a female than a male. Our boys are all great with new introductions. The girls take weeks - and one of them takes about six months before she's completely OK with a new addition.

If you have one female, I'd add a male. I do think intros of opposite sexes and different ages is far easier - though an older cat can easily be annoyed by the constant wanting-to-play of a kitten, and it will take an effort on your part to keep kitty plenty "played with" to ensure he or she doesn't drive your existing older kitty nuts.

I'd also highly recommend that you read this article about making cat introductions. Because cats are territorial, new introductions go MUCH easier if the cats are kept separated for a time - but allowed to smell, if not see, each other. http://www.thecatsite.com/Behavior/4...cing-Cats.html

Putting a screen door on a guest bedroom (temporarily) is the ideal.
post #17 of 24
Thread Starter 
Thanks for the info on introductions! My plan was to keep the new kitten in my bedroom for safety (keep out of mischeif) and so s/he can be introduced slowly to my other cat and my dogs. My current cat does not sleep in my bedroom most of the time, and I have the door closed fairly often so she can't come in, so it should not be too stressful on her for her not to be able to get in the room.
The only thing I have to figure out is how to make my doors stay shut, because they do not have a latch and my dogs can push them open! I just hope the (slow) introduction goes ok, I don't know is my kitty has been with other cats before... Luckily if I get the kitten from the current litter he will be available right about when I start winter break from college, so I will have 3-4 weeks where I will be home most of the time.
post #18 of 24
Great idea,..about waiting to see which one you will bond with,...for me,..thats what I meant in an earlier post regarding whether I should adopt a male or a female,...because the lady has a female torti,...that I instantly fell for,..lol,..but I will listen for once to my husbands opinion,...just this once,...lol,..I will know once I actually meet the others,...There are 2 blk males,..I do believe in the same litter as the torti female,..,..I have a "funny" feeling,..about this as its probably going to be one of the blk little boys,..or the red male,..he is simply gorgeous too,...but,...I don't need a kitten that is going to reek havic as my husband would say,...I have fostered some little terrors,....lol,..,...,..TLEA
post #19 of 24
From my experience, males tend to bond and play with each other better than two females or two of the opposite sex...
But as pp's have said, it depends on the cat.
I find females to be more moody and territorial with females especially and with males as well. Males tend to want to play and groom and generally annoy females while males tend to get along (if all neutered usually or if only one cat is un-neutered..I say usually as I have had an un-neutered male together with neutereds and they get along for the most part as there is no competition).

I am biased towards males though as I have 3 lovable, cuddly boys and none have sprayed either un-neutered or not at any age.
post #20 of 24
Currently we have a neutered male (he's 14) and a fixed female (she's 5). I really have to admit, I love neutered male cats. Mistoflees has been the NICEST cat we have ever owned. He was so good when my kids were born. When he got mad at them, he never hurt them, just put 1 claw out and then walked away. He loves to be rubbed on his belly, and is so affectionate. He does spray- sometimes to mark his territory (mostly outside) and inside he does it to get our attention if he wants something. It's a bad habit, and with him being so old now, I don't even know if we could break him of it.

I do adore my female kitty Sneaky Pie. But she is a BRAT. She'll only come to you on HER terms, and has never really been a fan of affection. She plays more than Mistoflees does, much to the amusement of my kids, her favorite game at the moment is hiding underneith something, and then "attacking" her "prey", sometimes it's toys, sometimes it's feet (I know, another bad habit). I don't know if some of it has to do with her being a girl, or if some of it has to do with her being a Torbie, I've heard that tortise shell kitties can be on the hyper side.
post #21 of 24
Yes,...as I have always felt that males do tend to be alot less moody,...& not quite as independent as any of the females that I have had,..I am going to try,...& reach that one lady this wkend,...hopefully she "feels" up to it,...lol,..IF not,..then I will have to wait & see when I can reach the other lady that has a few shaded silver males that will be ready in a few wks,...meanwhile,...I will take care of what I have to here,..& thats get my malltese in to the vet to be spayed,...since she is a BIG whine baby,...lol,..& spoiled rotten,...& will probably demand alot of attention,..& not want a young kitten around her while she is recovering from her surgery,.even if its lasic/laser?,..I am sure she won't be feeling all that great for a bit,...
At any rate,,.I do know even tough,..that one female torti,...is the cutest of all fo them,..I do believe she would cause some problems here,...& I think one of the males would fit into our family the best,..& I have to take into consideration,..all of us,.....Thanks for your input on all of your babies,...Its helped me a great deal to make my final decision,...Have a great evening!!! TLEA
post #22 of 24
Thread Starter 
Well I just hope if I do get a male he isn't TOO cuddly as in a lap cat, because my female kitty is a lap cat and if the male is too they'll be competing for laps! I have read that Maine Coons tend to prefer to hang out near their owners and are not usually lap cats, though... My female kitty (domestic shorthair) will just climb up on anyone's lap and start purring a kneading, even if it's a stranger. As soon as you sit down she'll be up on your lap!
post #23 of 24
Hello,

I have a male and a female and they get along wonderfully. Sadie will walk up to Stanley and rub against him, and in turn he'll nuzzle her and lick her. It's the cutest thing in the world to watch. It's like they are a little married couple ha ha!

Stanley is an attention hog. If you are standing around he'll meow at you to give him some attention. He's very much a lap cat and just loves having people around for company. He has a very good temperment and loves just about anyone that walks in the door.

Sadie on the other hand is very skittish and gets stressed out really easily. She seems to have good days where you can walk around her and she won't run, but then there are other times where she will run away as fast as she can to get away. If she wants pets though (which is rare) she will let you side beside her and pet her. I got her from my sister, who got her from the SPCA so who knows what has happened in her previous homes.

I personally haven't noticed a difference in how tidy they are. They are about the same that way.

I really don't think sex is a very big factor in how the cat's temperment will be. It's all in how it's brought up and their own personality.
post #24 of 24
Thank You for your comment,...lol,.or your view you just helped me a GREAT deal...since this is what "my gut feeling" was on this anyway,...since I now have a female,...adding a male would make the most sense,(I have a few in mind),..lol...as I have had a very bad experience many yrs ago,.where the mother & daughter could not be left alone at all,..the daughter used to really "beat up on" her mom,...if I didn't seperate them,...& keep it that way,...& it was very hard on all of us,..,....Stanley & Sadie are both adorable,...Sadie sounds alot like my Faith,...& Stanley sounds just like my male that I lost recently,.,..he was so lovable,...he was "huggable",...lol,..Have a great evening & weekend!!! TLEA
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