Lol. The peeing part isn't funny, you saying he'll lay in it is. It sounds like she's jealous, and him being the "mean" one makes it worse, she has no reason to love him and sees him taking her object, you, away. He has to be nicer to her so she doesn't see as him as a threat.
And I agree with...
Don't blame yourself, it's your loss not his and really hurts, but if you can get through the pain, think he lived his life with so much love and happiness and its a whole life which iis not a life span human life. An animal whole life is a human child, we go on.
It's bad behavior, period. So many wouodnt accept the same behavor in a human child but excuse it in animals. An animal is not a human child, it doesn't reason or understand cause and effect. Love it of course but don't put up what with what the animal world wouodnt.
Yup fleas, worms etc can be treated.however usually expensive and although most would want to, they just can't afford it. Then get into basic grooming that isn't taught and has to be done, and even the well intentioned and loving just can't take that on.
I'm not saying anthing bad about you at...
My opinion only, and this post was really sad.
But, sometimes an agressive fearful cat will great fully benefit from another cat. Like a security blanket for them.
If it has diabetes, that's not something not everyone can afford, it's reality, especially with paying for your own health...
I lived on a farm, and as sad it sounds he sounds like a lucky one. A lot of times barn cats aren't even fed with the thinking it will make them better hunters because they have to hunt for food. Which of course isn't true, it's mostly play and a well fed cat will be better.
In my experience...
I have to agree with the only cat to cat aggression. And for the op, at one time I had a male cat that thought I was his bio mom I think. But he was a 4 week old very sick baby when I got him and fed him with an eye dropper so I understood. I also had another male cat that was adopted and...