new kitten testing my patience

[kittypoopyface]

I've had my kitten about 3 weeks now. He was a stray found on the street by a lady living a few streets away i met on Facebook. I love him to bits. he's gorgeous and can be very loving. he can also be horrible to me. I would like some advice on training his behavior please as i am starting to lose my temper with him to a point i am not comfortable with. I have contemplated giving him away if it doesn't change - but i am not a quitter and would rather help him settle. 

I don't think he was on the street for long because he seems very healthy and his nails and teeth are in perfect condition. i guess he was around 8-9 weeks when i got him. i suspect he may have been the last in the litter and a home was too difficult to find. He was alone when found (perhaps the lady made up the story of finding him and responded to my call for an 'unwanted pet' thinking the stray story would encourage e to take him?)

The first day i had him he was naturally very timid and following a good feed he slept under the table for the day. The next day he was more playful. 

The routine we have is:

He bothers me for and hour or two before i am due to wake up. Usually if i cover my head and show him my back he gives up. 

I get up, clean out any poop from his litter tray. One or two days i have left just one poop in there - if i have been in a rush - but will only do that if i am confident there is enough space with clean litter. He litter trained within about 3 days once i discovered he liked a bit of soil on the litter - a practiced i stopped following another few days - no soil has been used for 2 weeks now. 

I feed him in the morning a handful of dry biscuits and half a pouch of wet food, i also clean and refill his milk bowl. he refused to drink water. 

I go to work following a little fuss. 

i return and he greets me at the door. i fuss him and usually feed him right away. More dry food and the other half of the pouch. 

He doesn't seem to be so into the dry food and will save it for later. It goes eventually. 

i then check the litter tray and clean if need be. I scoop it daily and do a full clean roughly every 3 days. 

Despite having been very good with litter training the last few days he has been very naughty. He has peed on two piles of clothes, has been pooping on the edge of the tray so it hits the floor, he pooped in a basket of nick nacks in the bathroom and just now right next to the bin bag waiting to go out - despite his litter tray being freshly cleaned this morning and currently empty. 

Like i said i give hi fuss when i get home but when i sit down for my coffee and 5 min relax before cracking on with life's demands he will start attacking me. scratching and biting. I cant tell if he is trying to be playful or aggressive. Stern tones do nothing, wagging finger, nothing, pick him up and move him, he is back with vengeance, i stamp my foot sometimes and that temporarily scares him off but not for long. We go through this for at least half an hour each night. It's distressing me as i am covered in scratches. He even attacked me as i sat on the toilet the other night. I really don't know what to do and am starting to really lose it with him. I am scared of becoming aggressive myself.

Her has toys and plenty of space to roam and run. 

Later in the evening when he has calmed down i fuss him and stroke him loads and he is very loving then. Any tips of getting rid of this hellish stage he puts me through each night. 

He has been flee'd but not wormed (i don't see any signs he needs this and he isn't allowed out.) i hear castration might calm him down but i wanted to try and avoid this. is this true? at what age should you do that? I would rather have some training tips and help condition his behavior without such extreme intervention (don't get me wrong i would get him neutered immediately if he was an outdoors cat) 

please help. 

 

[jwathas]

First of all, you NEED to get him neutered, but not until he is about 6 months old.  Male cats that are left intact will spray all over the place to mark their territory and it smells horrible.  Trust me, you will likely never get that smell out.  You also don't want him getting out of the house and impregnating a female in heat and contribute to the already huge overpopulation of cats.  Intact male cats can smell a female in heat from miles away and he could easily go bolting out the door to get to her.  Also, you should not be giving him milk.  He needs water for hydration and to keep his kidneys healthy, so it's time to stop the milk.  He will drink water.  Just leave it out and make sure it is always fresh.  Our cats only get milk very, very rarely as a special treat and it's only when it's leftover from our cereal bowls and never any other times.  Lactose is not good for cats.  Plus, dairy just adds unnecessary extra calories to their diet anyway.  As far has his behavior, you have a perfectly normal kitten.  Kittens of that age are not capable of being aggressive. He is simply playing with you.  With the litter box, it sounds like he was never properly box trained, so now you'll need to do that.  Whenever he wakes up from a nap, after he eats, and after he doing a lot of playing, place him in the litter box.  Make sure you are starting him out with a sand-type litter, not the gravel type.  A lot of kittens and even adult cats do not like the gravel type.  If he still has trouble using the box, you'll want to take him to a vet to rule out any medical causes.

 

[talkingpeanut]

Good advice above. You should take a deep breath and try to calm down. This kitten does not have malicious intent.

Agree that he needs litter box bootcamp. Don't change a litter suddenly that a cat is using and liking. Some cats are also pickier about the box being clean than others.

He definitely does need to be wormed. Probably three times in 2-3 week intervals. He was on the street and almost all kittens are born with worms. He will also need to be spayed, for the sanity of both of you sharing a house. Has he been to a vet? You should rule out any medical conditions.

When he bites or scratches, don't pick him up or wag your finger. Just walk away. Otherwise he'll interpret it as a game.

And agree that he has to stop with the milk. Cats can't digest lactose.

Lastly, a second kitten could be an excellent idea. It would teach this one manners and they would entertain themselves.

 

[ellag]

kittens that young need to eat as much as they want. the more wet the better, imo. he's probably hungry. also the best thing for an unruly hyper kitten is...another kitten of the same approximate age. they need a buddy to play with, cuddle and groom etc...they are fun to watch and you'll get some peace..

you may not think it but 2 kittens are really easier than 1!

 

[ruaryx]

I agree with everyone else.  Get him neutered, get him dewormed, get a vet to rule out any medical reasons for the improper litter box use, stop feeding milk, feed more wet food.  And also, set aside some time to play with him each day to tire him out.  You said that you "fuss" him, which is great, (I'm assuming this is petting and cuddling) but you should also play with him with toys.  Wave a wand around, throw a mouse, something to use up his kitten energy.  Please don't give up on him.  He's only being a playful kitten.  

 

[shadowsrescue]

Has he been to the vet yet?  If not, that should be step one.  You want to know his age and when it's safe to neuter.  Many vets will neuter at 8-10 weeks or 2 lbs.  You don't need to wait until 6 months of age.  The sooner the better.  Yet you want him vaccinated and wormed too.  You may not see the worms, but they could be there. 

Kittens have boundless energy.  Play with him as much as you can.  Try a da bird toy or other wand toy or a laser pointer.  You can play with him and then give him a small special snack after each session.  This helps to satisfy the hunt, catch, kill, eat, groom, sleep process.  You play to satisfy the hunt, catch, kill.  Then you offer a small snack for the "eat" and then the kitty will groom himself and take a nap.  YOu can do this over and over throughout the day.

 

[kittypoopyface]

Wow thanks for the great advice everyone. I shall swap to water and worm him immediately.

He hasn't been to the vet yet as I'm waiting for pay day.

I use the little wood pellets for litter and he doesn't usually seem to have an issue. In fact he has been very good today.

A second kitty would be great but I am in a flat and there's not room. Plus I doubt I could afford it.

I definitely give him play full attention and he loves it when I play with the wand and his little balls. I think the 'agression' is him instigating this - but I can't always oblige. I need to be in control of when we play rather than have him demand.

I'm sure we will get there. Thanks again everyone.

 

[paiger8]

I don't know if this has been mentioned, but make sure when you're playing, don't play aggressively with your hands. Sometimes kittens won't know the difference between little play bites and big bites. Offer toys, and plush animals for him to "attack." If he starts to play attack your hands or arms, divert attention with a toy. Then he knows that human hands aren't toys for biting.

Congratulations on your new kitten and thanks for not giving up on him! 

 

[pnutbuttercat]

There is some great advice here - I'm glad you got the help you needed. Kittens can be a handful, especially if you've never had one before. I just wanted to add one thing though because no one else mentioned it: cats don't drink a lot of water, nowhere near as much water as dogs. So you will probably not see your little guy using his water bowl very much, but that doesn't mean he's rejecting it (in fact, if you do notice him drinking frequently, that's a sign that he might have a health problem, usually kidney issues/diabetes, though he'd be awful young for those things!).

If it helps, I've had many cats in my life (never fewer than 3 at a time) and I still get frustrated/annoyed with my kittens! I recently adopted a sibling pair and they are hell on wheelsBut the bond that you have with a cat you've raised from kittenhood is truly special. They can live 20+ years if well-cared for - that's a whole era of your life that they share with you. Someday your fiesty little furball will be a crotchey old man and you will find yourself laughing about all the naughty stuff he used to do and wondering how you ever could've lived without him. In fact, the more effort you have to put in, the more they mean to you sometimes (this coming from someone who once had a cat who liked to shred wallpaper and eat it!).

Good luck to you and your kitty! May you have a long, loving life together.

 

[kittypoopyface]

i'm really chuffed for all the kind help here. 

in fairness (maybe Murphy's law) he has been a beaut these last two days. very minimal biting. i have put out a variety of small card board boxes for him. he loves them  

excellent entertainment. 

what about the cat milk that supermarkets sell? should this be avoided then. i don't want to rob him of calcium.

 

[jwathas]

 
what about the cat milk that supermarkets sell? should this be avoided then. i don't want to rob him of calcium.

That stuff is junk.  He should not have any milk in his diet whatsoever.  Only water.  A good quality kitten food will provide all of the nutrients that he needs.

 

[Columbine]

The cat milk from the supermarket should be considered as a treat only. So long as you're feeding a complete kitten food he'll be getting plenty of calcium. If you really want to give him some milk, goat's milk is much more digestible than cows milk. It's sometimes even used as a KMR substitute!

Remember that his kitten food is important though - you don't want her filling up on milk and not having any room left for his dinner

 

[kittypoopyface]

i have had him on water for two days now. The water level hasn't changed much. i will persevere. 

Behavior isn't much better. i have ignored him when biting and scratching. distracted him. he still comes back. my legs are covered in scratches. 

last night he managed to cover his litter tray with the edges of the plastic litter tray bags i use. so when he couldn't get to his litter to pee instead he climbed under my quilt and peed on my bed. the problem is obvious but seriously how am i supposed to react to his stupid behaviors when i am asleep. why would he choose to come and pee next to me. it wasn't even like he'd tried to wake me. 

don't get me wring i have completed all my pet  owner duties today re food and a little attention - but i'am finding it difficult to love him at the moment. i'm starting to see him as something that has come to make my life more challenging - not that it was easy enough before. The scratching of my carpet, sofa etc i can live with. peeing on my bed is a bit too much for me 

 

[Columbine]

Remember that cats naturally have a low thirst drive. He'll be getting a fair amount of the water he needs from his wet food. He's probably drinking a little when you're not looking. Just remember to keep the water fresh - cats don't like stale water any more than we do

He might just have had a genuine accident last night. He's still very young, and kittens make mistakes -just like small children do. If he's covering his litterbox with the liner you could try either taping the edges of the liner to the box, or even consider not using a liner at all.

Try to stay patient with him. As he grows and learn his behaviour should improve.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

You've been given the best advice already.  I would only add that a stick-and-string toy is a wonderful way to play interactively without making your hands a target.  Remember that all play is honing hunt/kill skills.  Don't let your fingers becomes "mice." 

Take a deep breath, and remember that having a kitten that age is the equivalent to having a toddler, and a 2-year-old toddler at that.  There will be accidents, and mistakes, and upsets, but it does get better. 

 

[donutte]

I don't think I've ever had a kitten where I didn't end up covered in scratches somehow, lol. 

Kittens are SO extremely playful. After years of having only adult cats (teenage adults at that) I'd forgotten what it was like. Then I got two kittens in July, and wow, they are quite the handful. Definitely get him checked out at the vet though. And yes, like previously mentioned, you do NOT need to wait till he's six months old. If he's over 2 lbs, most vets will neuter at that point. If the vet charges too much, look to see if there is a spay/neuter clinic in your area. Some of them are strictly for TNRs, but a lot of them will also neuter pets (for a fee, but not as much as the vet usually). If there is a no-kill shelter in your area, that might be a good starting point into finding a spay/neuter clinic.

I doubt your kitten is truly being "aggressive", but rather playful. However, they have sharp little talons that seem to just scratch like nobody's business. And sharp little teeth! Even if they don't mean to scratch, they often do anyway. 

Just keep at it. They are not kittens for long. Next thing you know, you'll have a graceful adult kitty who will adore you and love you.

 

[talkingpeanut]

Also, trim his nails! He should get used to this anyway.

 

[donutte]

Also, trim his nails! He should get used to this anyway.

Gah, I was thinking it, forgot to type it! 

Not sure I believe the getting used to it part though, haha. My Oliver still acts like I'm murdering him. We have to take breaks between each nail, lol.

 

[mingking]

Not sure if this was mentioned yet, but try a scratching post! A cheap way to do this is to get some sisal twine and wrap it around a table leg - no glue necessary. Just really tight knots!

Try throwing a toy when he starts attacking you. Have a few in your pocket so you always have something to distract him when he's feeling playful with you. 

 

[jwathas]

You have been given very good advice here.  What you need to realize is that he won't be a kitten forever and he will eventually outgrow this behavior.  Trust me.  I have raised many cats from kittenhood, so I know.  We currently have two 5-month-old kittens and they can definitely be a handful, but you need to be patient with him and get him to a vet as soon as possible.  Our guys don't scratch our furniture since they have both a scratching pad and a scratching post that they use, so they leave our furniture alone, which I am very thankful for since all of our furniture is brand spanking new.  As has already been mentioned, cats are desert animals and they drink a minimal amount of water by nature, so they need to eat canned/wet food on a regular basis to ensure that that they get enough moisture to keep their kidneys and urinary tracts healthy.  We have always had great luck with the Fancy Feast brand.  They even make a kitten formula of Fancy Feast, which our two little guys eat along with their dry kitten food.  It is a turkey and liver formula and even has a little bit of milk in it.   No, it's not absolutely necessary to wait until at least 6 months to neuter, but that is my personal preference as I like to let my guys physically mature and develop their masculine features before they have all of that testosterone taken away from them, but it won't harm him if you do it sooner.  Don't get mad at him and don't give up on it.  Also, try not to get mad at him.  Kittens and cats can sense that and it can put a strain on your relationship with him.  He is just a baby.  You will soon have a much calmer, loving adult.  They don't stay kittens for very long.