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Written by Wendy Christensen
Q: A month ago my Persian died and now I have my other cat alone. The Persian and my remaining cat were raised together for 11 years. My remaining cat has never been alone without other cats around. I am very concerned about her quality of life now. She mainly sleeps and not much else, whereas when she had her sister she would at least play a little, or even just watch my Persian get into trouble. Does she need a new kitten with her, even though I do have a concern about her age. She is not demonstrating any behavior changes that are visible to me. Initially of course she was looking for her sister, but she has seem to have stopped that. Would it be to her benefit and quality of life to bring in a new kitten? Or leave her be?
A: I'm glad you're concerned about your cat's physical and emotional well-being after the loss of her, and your, long-time companion. Like people, cats grieve, in their own way, for their lost friends. Because your cat has never lived without another cat in the family, she may be feeling rather lost and confused. I've always maintained that everybody needs a "friend of their own species"
You know your cat best, and only you can finally decide if a new companion cat is right for her, and you. Adult cats tend to be creatures of habit, and very set in their ways, so trying to introduce another adult cat could be difficult. But even the most stodgy adult cats seem to show a remarkable amount of tolerance for young kittens.
Though 11 is not old for a cat in my book, at your cat's age, a young rambunctious kitten might be a bit too much. But TWO kittens might be just right. A pair of young kittens (no older than twelve weeks, ideally) would quickly bond with each other, play and romp together, and provide that feline presence in the house your cat misses -- without taxing her energy. Instead of pestering your older kitty for play and interaction (as a single kitten would probably do), a pair of kittens will likely provide entertainment, amusement and solace for her as they play and interact with each other.
Watching the kittens play might well give your older cat a new lease on life, and relieve her feelings of being lost and alone. She may even choose to join in the fun -- though you would want to leave that up to her! As the kittens grow up, you could try involving all three cats in daily interactive play sessions with a fishing-pole toy. This would help them all bond, and be good exercise for everybody. Let your older cat participate as much, or as little, as she pleases.
When I adopted three tiny littermates from a shelter a few years ago, I was a bit worried that my senior cat, Petunia (almost nineteen at the time), would find them a bit too much. I always made sure she had the option to retreat to a quiet, private area if she wanted to. But instead, I usually found her relaxing in her favorite chair, intently watching the kittens' antics. I think the kittens provided her with much amusement and happiness in that latter part of her life.
Q: For some reason one of my female 3yr old cats, Precious, constantly wakes me up every night meowing at my bedroom window. The mini blinds are closed and she is pawing at them. I am on the 3rd floor of an apartment. She has 3 other windows where the mini blinds are raised about 2 feet so she can get in the window sill and see. But for some reason she HAS to paw at the one in the bedroom that is closed for privacy. I will squirt her with the water bottle but she will return a few minutes later. We play this little game almost every night for up to 3 hours a night. At one point I gave in and raised the blinds but then she would stretch and paw at them up in the air! I give up! I need my sleep, and I can't even lock her out of the bedroom.... because then she paws and meows all night at the door!
A: It sounds like her fondness for pawing at this particular window is a "highly motivated behavior." It's clearly important enough for her to persist even when squirted with water and otherwise reprimanded by you. The mystery is... Why?
There are a couple of possibilities:
1. There's something fascinating to her that's visible ONLY out of that window. What is visible out that window at the time(s) of night she's so interested in it? Pretend you're a cat, stand exactly where she does, put your face at her level and look out. What do you see?
2. But much more likely is that she sees this whole rigamarole as a fun, rewarding and pleasurable game: As you yourself put it, "We play this little game almost every night for up to 3 hours a night." She may well be doing this because her activities get and hold your attention. She craves interaction with you - a craving that she doesn't feel is satisfied during your everyday waking interactions.
Precious is likely bored and lonesome, a feeling that may be overwhelming to her at night. Perhaps she feels that her nighttime game is the only time she can have you all to herself. Some cats (like some people) just seem to need more "face time" than others. Precious may be more emotionally needy than your other cats, and has devised this solution (her "game") to get the extra attention from you she needs.
Precious may see these constant "wake up calls" as a good way to share more special time with you. She's cleverly creating her own opportunities, while you're a "captive audience."
Is there a room you can fix up as her "private boudoir?" (This could be a spare bedroom, bathroom, etc.) Make sure it's cat-safe. Put into the room everything she needs: litter box(es), scratching post, a small snack (very small amount of dry food), water, comfy cat bed, and a few toys. Play a radio or CD player softly to mask noises from outdoors or elsewhere, and help settle her down.
Before bedtime each night, spend some time playing just with Precious, and then just quietly winding down with her and your other cats. Use special "ritual phrases" at each stage of your evening routines. Cats seem to love hearing the same words, repeated in the same tone, from their favorite people. It seems to reassure them in some way. Start with an interactive play session (with a fishing-pole toy like "Da Bird" or "Kitty Tease") to wear the cats out. Serve a few tasty, healthy treats. Then escort Precious to her luxury boudoir, kiss her goodnight, and close the door. Then go to bed.
She may whine and cry for a few nights. Ignore her. (It's hard, but you have to!) It's very important that you are gentle, matter-of-fact, loving, and above all, consistent about this. Try not to feel guilty or conflicted - she may well pick up on this and take advantage. If the meowing bothers you, play a radio or CD softly in YOUR room, too. It will help mask the kitty-whining, and you may find it very relaxing. Many people do.
Cats, being crepuscular (dawn/dusk) hunters, are naturally more active at night than during the daylight hours. They can adjust quite nicely to our schedules, but only if they also get the interaction and attention, the stimulation and exercise, they need during the day.
Herding Cats at Home June 2005 1
Herding Cats at Home June 2005 3
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