My first Feral Rescue Problem

[neurorehabcat7]

Hi
On Nov 23, 2023, a Vet's Office asked me and my to adopt a rescue stray cat that had some medical issues they'd taken care of. The woman who brought him in fed him outside, but couldn't keep him because he didn't get along with her 3 female cats. They guestimated him to be about 5yrs old. I am having trouble getting him to feel comfortable around me in a weird, wicked way..
He stays in my extra bedroom on the trundle bed where the pillows for the head sit. He has not played with a single to or scratch post I have brought in there.
Now, that is usually work out room. I kind of haven't been able to do anything in that room.
I can go in there, sit on the bed with him with Delectables for him to eat. He also likes the glove with nubbies on it and being rubbed with feathers that result in weird cirque du soleil gymnastics I never saw in the previous 3 cats I rescued before. His hind leg spread into my face is a regular thing. He likes being petted, all things that make him motor purr and knead the bed.
Now, his litter box is on the enclosed patio, as is his food and water fountain. If I:m in the living or dining room, he"ll go down the hall thru my bedroom to get to these things. Sometimes he sits and stares out the window at the wildlife that includes a mite swan, the canal and golf course.
Sometimes he sits at the entry of the sliding glass door, maybe kneads the throw rug, letting me know I need to put out fresh food.
But if for some reason he comes thru the hall and we cross paths, he makes an about face and hauls ass back into the bedroom to hide between the mattresses of the bed, where he spent the 1st few weeks.
When I come into the room he looks , happy, if that's possible. I believe he associates me with food. But he won't jump on me. I can't pick him up. I cant approach him with two,hands ---,l he needs ear medication. for > 30 years I've adopted feral and outdoor cats and they have always been welcoming and loving, especially when they see the toys and cat condo
I have never rescued a cat before that runs everytime he sees me. I know he wanders at night. I see the angel lights come on and he is somewhat clumsy. Yet he seems to be scared of almost everything. If somebody knocks at the door or comes over, he hides between the mattresses.. When he hides I leave him alone. I don’t try to force him out or to do anything, He doesn't meow. He makes a squeaking noise once in a while. . He won't even come near me at night when he roams around.
Sorry for the long post, but how can I make him feel comfortable enough for him to venture other furniture and let me pick him up?
I feel like if I Just keep giving him his space, he won’t even try to have a relationship with me or that it will just continue on like this forever.. I just want my rescue cat to feel loved.

 

[Sarthur2]

I hate to say it, but a shy cat like this may take many more months to get completely comfortable with you. It’s going to be on his timetable and not yours, no matter what you do.

Since he accepts you when you come in the room to visit, and he’s comfortable roaming at night when it’s quiet, the prospects of him eventually coming around are good. However, for now, it sounds like your spare room is his safe space.

I’ve adopted cats who take a year or more to get comfortable after coming from all kinds of situations. And some who get comfortable with me but never with my other cats.

My best advice is to love him on his terms and to have no expectations or any time frame. One day he may surprise you!

 

[neurorehabcat7]

I hate to say it, but a shy cat like this may take many more months to get completely comfortable with you. It’s going to be on his timetable and not yours, no matter what you do.

Since he accepts you when you come in the room to visit, and he’s comfortable roaming at night when it’s quiet, the prospects of him eventually coming around are good. However, for now, it sounds like your spare room is his safe space.

I’ve adopted cats who take a year or more to get comfortable after coming from all kinds of situations. And some who get comfortable with me but never with my other cats.

My best advice is to love him on his terms and to have no expectations or any time frame. One day he may surprise you!

We're still there .... as required work and inspections for buildings our age are happening as we approach hurricane season, whenever we have a knock on the door or someone comes in -- never needing to access that room, he high tails it for my room where he hides between the bed pedestal and wall, usually for the remainder of the day.
We still have a gingerly situation if we happen to cross paths in the hallway as I am just doing any thing and he is going for food. He usually high tails it back to his room
Call me confused.

 

[tabbytom]

Hi
On Nov 23, 2023, a Vet's Office asked me and my to adopt a rescue stray cat that had some medical issues they'd taken care of. ................................................................................... I feel like if I Just keep giving him his space, he won’t even try to have a relationship with me or that it will just continue on like this forever.. I just want my rescue cat to feel loved.

Firstly, thank you for adopting this sweet kitty and for giving him a warm and fur-ever loving home and a safe sanctuary to live out his life . He's lovely!

Secondly, I agree with Sarthur2 , he could be a shy cat and could need more than a few months for him to be comfy with you.

As with all rescues, we do not know their history. It's hard to guess what they have gone through and thus they display certain behaviour that is hard to decipher.
My boy is also a rescue and he was double dumped. He was around 3 - 4 weeks then and he's coming to be 9 years old at year end. He is afraid of loud sounds and noise and footsteps coming from the corridor and poles that we use to dry our laundry. We too, never knew his story and we are still guessing why is he afraid of such things.

For you case, it's not the end. He still like being petted, rubbed with feather, purr and knead and not to mention spreading his hind legs in your face. These are signs of confidence in you in a way.

The other is about him venturing around and cross paths with you, there must be something in the movements by you that cold have reminded him of something that he encoded before that wasn't so pleasant to him and that sent him back to the room to be safe.

Maybe what you can do is have some of his toys strewn around and each time you guys meet, you can just squat down to make yourself smaller and use the toys and play with him. No offence, It could be your stature that he finds intimidating. It's ok when you are petting him as you are likely to be on the floor.

Don't give up as yet. Give him more time. Spread more of your clean unwashed non perfume garments around so that he gets more used to your scents around the house and also do the same for hm, get some towels for him to lay on to soak up his scents and then spread it on the cat tree or furniture you want him to get on or get some catnip and spread somer over the cat tree.

Keep talking to him and give him slow eye blinking. Have food or snacks in your hands and offer to him so that he can come near to you. Have more play time with him. I guess he needs more interactions with you.

Lastly, give him time to soak the whole thing in to help him realise that this is his home. Love, patience and routines rules the day.

Do keep us updated. BTW, what is his name?

 

[neurorehabcat7]

Firstly, thank you for adopting this sweet kitty and for giving him a warm and fur-ever loving home and a safe sanctuary to live out his life . He's lovely!

Secondly, I agree with Sarthur2 , he could be a shy cat and could need more than a few months for him to be comfy with you.

As with all rescues, we do not know their history. It's hard to guess what they have gone through and thus they display certain behaviour that is hard to decipher.
My boy is also a rescue and he was double dumped. He was around 3 - 4 weeks then and he's coming to be 9 years old at year end. He is afraid of loud sounds and noise and footsteps coming from the corridor and poles that we use to dry our laundry. We too, never knew his story and we are still guessing why is he afraid of such things.

For you case, it's not the end. He still like being petted, rubbed with feather, purr and knead and not to mention spreading his hind legs in your face. These are signs of confidence in you in a way.

The other is about him venturing around and cross paths with you, there must be something in the movements by you that cold have reminded him of something that he encoded before that wasn't so pleasant to him and that sent him back to the room to be safe.

Maybe what you can do is have some of his toys strewn around and each time you guys meet, you can just squat down to make yourself smaller and use the toys and play with him. No offence, It could be your stature that he finds intimidating. It's ok when you are petting him as you are likely to be on the floor.

Don't give up as yet. Give him more time. Spread more of your clean unwashed non perfume garments around so that he gets more used to your scents around the house and also do the same for hm, get some towels for him to lay on to soak up his scents and then spread it on the cat tree or furniture you want him to get on or get some catnip and spread somer over the cat tree.

Keep talking to him and give him slow eye blinking. Have food or snacks in your hands and offer to him so that he can come near to you. Have more play time with him. I guess he needs more interactions with you.

Lastly, give him time to soak the whole thing in to help him realise that this is his home. Love, patience and routines rules the day.

Do keep us updated. BTW, what is his name?

There's no way I'm giving up on him!!! I took in a boy several years ago who got kicked out of a friend's apt because the roommate's bratty 3yr old teased him into a corner so he ended up scratching her. When I crossed paths with the roommate I told him to train his brat (btw I'm a special needs kiddo therapist) before she becomes the next Ted Bundy.
Current fur baby is named Euro €, like the European Money €.
He came with meds for his ears that I have been unable to give him, and I don't push. I checked with my own vet who said it's not the.end of the world if he doesn't get them and is standing by for when we get to the point when I can pick him up and bring him in.
The woman I got him from is busting.my chops that he hasn't been back to the.vet since I got him. The vet asked me," is this the same woman who couldn't even be bothered bringing him to you? "
Plus, she has said would send someone to take him -- probably the same person who brought him: a trapper. The vet says that unless I see anything concerning, and he feels i.am experienced, Euro is in good hands.